The Gossip Girl Realism Scale

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How realistic is Gossip Girl? Ask the natives. New York Magazine answers that question each week with its funny ranking system of the most real and surreal moments from the newest Gossip Girl episode.

This week's episode, "Blair Waldorf Must Pie," was deemed more realistic than not, coming in at +16. To be precise, real defeated unreal by the count of 37-21. Some key components of this week's realism scale ...

Smiling Serena
  • They've supposedly put Serena's tryst with Nate behind them, but Blair's occasional flare-ups of rage about Serena sleeping with her boyfriend are totally realistic. Plus 10.
  • For the love of God, Brooklyn is not that hard to figure out. If we still maintain the charade that the Humphreys live in Williamsburg, why do they keep showing the Brooklyn Bridge. Why do they play football in Brooklyn Bridge Park? Minus 2.
  • When Dan picks up Serena, he notices the book Lily is reading. "Nicholas Sparks," young Humphrey scoffs with amused derision. Has he ever been more Williamsburg? Plus 4.
  • The opening scene shows Serena all wasted, swanning around what looks to be Nolita or the Lower East Side. Why is she downtown? Why is Dan? "Who gets drunk on Thanksgiving?" asks Blair, forgetting that everyone gets drunk on Thanksgiving. Minus 4.
  • "You know what's really weird," Blair Waldorf observes during a rare visit to Dan's apartment in Brooklyn, "there's a garage door in your room." THANK YOU, BLAIR. Plus 2.
  • Nate's weird, highlighted Zac Efron hairstyle is the same in all the flashbacks, even though we know that he had normal, not Aqua Netted hair at the beginning of the school year. Minus 1.
  • How funny is it that the first time we see Blair's future gay dad, he's wearing a cheesy Banana Republic half Argyle sweater. Plus 1.
  • Allison sucks. Period. Minus 5.
  • Okay, so Blair is bulimic. Plus 3, but only 3, because even though it's totally accurate, it doesn't bode well that the writers went to the eating-disorder place so early.

Funny stuff... and pretty much spot-on. Follow this link for New York Magazine's full commentary and Gossip Girl scorecard.

Recovering a Bit

Steve Marsi is the Managing Editor of TV Fanatic. Follow him on Google+ or email him here.

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Gossip Girl Quotes

Serena: It doesn't make sense!
Blair: Feelings never do. They get you all confused. Then they drive you around for hours before they drop you right back where you started.

We make our own fortunes, and call them fate. And what better excuse to choose a path than to insist it's our destiny? But at the end of the day, we all have to live with our choices ... no matter who's looking over our shoulder.

Gossip Girl