Gossip Girl Round Table: "The Serena Also Rises"

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As fans gather in our Gossip Girl fashion statement ...

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1. What was the best Gossip Girl quote from the episode?

DANdy: A reminder of just how sweet and innocent Lonely Boy remains, in spite of the amoral carnage so often thrown in his face: "If I have to exploit people to be a good writer, then maybe I don't want to be a good writer."

Mister Meester: When a hyperventilating Blair yells “Don’t ever go to high school, Dorota! The girls are spoiled, stupid and ungrateful!” This implies that Dorota: 1. Cares. 2. Hasn't gone to high school before. 3. Would, at some time in the future.

Gossip Guy: No brainer. When Dan comes to Chuck's door and says "I know we don't like each other. You think I'm a boring, sheltered nobody." Chuck had the best response of all time... "I don't think of you." Chuck, you make the show.

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2. What do you think was in the envelope Bart gave Lily?

DANdy: A love letter from Eric to Clay Aiken.

Mister Meester: My guess is Serena isn't the only van der Woodsen to be involved in a sex tape. Man, people never think those are gonna get out.

Gossip Guy: Ooooh, I imagine we've only gotten slight insight into with her past with Rufus. Maybe medical records from that abortion when she was carrying Rufus' love child? Or even grosser, what if that love child was Serena. Or maybe, it's a picture of Lily's face before the nose job. Really, I have no clue and pray they reveal it next week.

3. More unrealistic: A high school sophomore deciding to quit school to work in fashion full-time, or a senior ordering shots and soliciting hookers in swanky N.Y.C. clubs?

Mister Meester: Jenny. Bribes go a long way when it comes to obtaining booze and nightclub admission. Getting around child labor laws is another story.

Gossip Guy: I'm going to assume that Chuck has the shady connections and money to secure a proper fake ID, so let's move on to Jenny. Seriously? A sophomore? Look, we all wanted to have a career at that age, but most of us worked at McDonalds.

DANdy: The latter. In this age of eighth graders being signed to collegiate basketball scholarships, can you really blame the fashion world for trying to find its LeBron James as early as possible?

4. Serena's Fashion Week dress: Hot or not?

Gossip Guy: Blah. You know, it's tough to find something unattractive on Serena, but Jenny Humphrey found a way. You know what, I'm glad Blair switched the outfits so we could all just see how unrealistic Jenny's full time fashion job would be.

DANdy: Not. The sooner Serena learns that she looks best in lingerie, the sooner "The Thong Song" can be part of the Gossip Girl music library.

Mister Meester: I wasn't a huge fan of J's work, to be frank. Although that frock would definitely go nicely with the floor of my apartment.

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5. What should Dan write about next?

Gossip Guy: I think he should write about a high school student who doesn't get into Yale since he can't hold a single writing job. That's certainly not leaving your comfort zone.

DANdy: Either a memoir about his first sexual experience titled "Getting Over the Hump" or a first-hand account of his father's rise to fame titled "The Rufus, the Rufus, the Rufus is on Fire."

Mister Meester: Charlie Trout's adventures were entertaining, but too overt. How about an Upper East Side girl named Claire Maldorf? Talk about issues - the girl is a psychiatrist's wet dream. P.S. Leighton Meester is so believable, it's awesome.

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Steve Marsi is the Managing Editor of TV Fanatic. Follow him on Google+ or email him here.

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Gossip Girl Season 2 Episode 5 Quotes

Dan: I know... we don't like each other. You think I'm a boring, sheltered nobody.
Chuck: I don't think of you.

It's like the plague. Only instead of vermin on my doorstep, I get the human being. Beat it, Humphrey. My sister doesn't dig stalkers.

Chuck