Gossip Girl Round Table: "The Witches of Bushwick"

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Welcome back to another edition of TVF's Gossip Girl Round Table, where our panel breaks down Monday's show (see our review of the episode earlier this morning).

Below, Gossip Girl staff writer Mister Meester joins editor-in-chief DANdy and esteemed TVF co-founder/shot-caller Gossip Guy to further discuss "The Witches of Bushwick" ...


1. What was your favorite Gossip Girl quote from last night?

Gossip Guy: I know the Chair fans will go nuts for the three little one syllable words in the comments, but I'll go with Blair's much more subtle response to where she's going: "I'm going to hell with the other sinners."

Mister Meester: "Girls know when a guy says that during it doesn't mean 'I love you,' it means 'I love having sex with you.'" Nate Archibald's wisdom defies comprehension.

DANdy: Gotta love Chuck invoking Brangelina in making a serious point about his relationship with Blair: "Look at Brad and Angelina. They take turns on top!"

GG RT Logo

2. Was Team Brooklyn's plot the most diabolical scheme in Gossip Girl history?

Gossip Guy: Breaking up several couples and ruining two girls' futures? I'd say so. Just one question, why would the Gothic Barbie mess with her own brother that's always been there for her? Messed up. Even for a raccoon.

Mister Meester: Jenny and Juliet together truly are a force to be reckoned with. I would have said yes even before Juliet DRUGGED AND KIDNAPPED Serena.

DANdy: Serena did cover up a murder once, right? So... close second.

3. What was the biggest plot hole of the night?

Gossip Guy: That either guy would confuse Juliet for the woman they dated. Come on, faces aside, the girl does her own hair and lacks a certain something something in the boobs department.

Mister MeesterAs I always say, I'm willing to overlook dubious details (i.e. everyone reading Gossip Girl blasts at the same time, one second after they're live, or texting the Dean as a means of withdrawing from Columbia) as long as the characters behave consistently. Which is why I'm focusing on Vanessa here. Typically, she acts above all the drama. Now all of a sudden she loathes Serena to an almost pathological degree? The writers seem totally at a loss with V.

DANdy: Neither Dan nor Nate recognizing that the lips they kissed didn't belong to Serena. God knows if I ever had the pleasure of kissing Blake Lively, I'd never forget it.

Chuck and Blair in Action

IT'S OVER, AGAIN: But is this breakup for the best?

4. Did Chuck and Blair make the right decision?

Gossip Guy: Uh oh, I'm about to go way too deep for a Gossip Girl Round Table, but I'm going to say yes. Sometimes, people become comfortable and don't grow while in a relationship. Blair exemplified this last season. I think the girl is right and she needs to be Blair Waldorf for now before she can become Chuck Bass' girlfriend. Fate (and the writers) will eventually bring them back together.

Mister Meester: I liked Chuck's if-you-love-her-set-her-free attitude, and can see where Blair's coming from to a point. But after deciding their love is more important than anything else, she does a 180 five minutes later after being chastised by Anne Archibald, who's married to a dude in PRISON? It just made no sense.

DANdy: Not unless the show actually keeps them apart for a few seasons, which is about as likely as me going two Round Table questions without invoking the beauty of Blake Lively.

5. Favorite couple: Derena, Serenate or Date?

Gossip Guy: Definitely Date. Speaking of Dates, can I crash their little Red Dead Redemption Romance back at the place? Toss me a controller. That's a threesome I could get in on. Hopefully they downloaded the Undead Nightmare DLC. Too nerdy?

Mister Meester: After seeing the new promo (see Gossip Girl spoilers), I'm back on Team Derena.

DANdy: Option D: Serena and whatever tight dress she's wearing.

BONUS: Rate last night on the Vanessa uselessness scale (1-10, 10 being the most useless).

Gossip Guy: 34.

Mister Meester: 9.5. See Juliet's direct acknowledgment of this, and my answer to #3.

DANdy: 8.5.

What do you think? Sound off in the comments!

Steve Marsi is the Managing Editor of TV Fanatic. Follow him on Google+ or email him here.


did anyone else notice that it's not the exact same scene in the promo as the actual scene in the episode when chuck says "I love you"? it way more intense and romatic in the promo and they are positioned different (if one can say so, I don't know)... just a thought.


1. quote- can't really decide between Nate's Mrs. Humphrey and Blair's "I know that you don't think my being with him is a good idea, but you have bad ideas all the time", cuz, really, when's the last time Serena had ANY good idea? :)
2. definitely most diabolical scheme. too bad Georgina wasn't around :)
4. there were a lot of huge plot holes- but the biggest was- withdrawing from Columbia by texting???? And, seriously, dean actually considering it official? so stupid. And I can't believe that Serena couldn't prove that she wasn't at the party from the beginning, I mean, Eric and Elliot witnessed her humiliation with the guy at the front, why couldn't they've said something??? and what happened with that huge amount of trust between S & B from "The Undergraduates"? Blair should know by now that Serena is not interested in becoming next Anne Archibald. And since we're talking about her, why is she suddenly so against Chuck? I mean, her own son is his roommate, she has known him throughout his entire life, and he helped her when she was having money problems. So what if he's a little rogue? :D
4. I definitely can not believe that Blair would give up love for carrier. I mean, she is far more smarter and ambitious than Serena, but she's also very romantic and vulnerable... If she could forgive Chuck for comparing her with sweaty old horse, for abandoning her in Italy, for sleeping with Vanessa and Jenny Humphrey, and for trading her for his hotel, she would NEVER leave him because she wants to "win Oscar first". it's stupid, but, writers needed reason to break them up for a while, and hate storyline obviously wouldn't work anymore, so...
5. Right now, my feelings for Dan are as same as they were for Nate while Serena had gone off the rails with certain married congressman. I felt so bad for Dan when Serena stood him up because of Colin, and I would like to see Derena again... they certainly aren't the most interesting GG couple, but I've kinda missed them... and I'm pretty sure that Serenate is end game, so let Humphrey enjoy his last piece of Serenacake :D And, Vanessa's uselessness... 1000. god, i hate that character, and I can't believe that I actually felt kinda sorry for her in "Goodbye, Columbia". Other thing that seems pretty unbelievable to me- how many space she gets from the writers. Yes, Jessica is pretty, but not THAT much.


Straight to hell with all the other sinners


Love Blair's "Straight to hell, with all the other sinners" and its delivery. Nice lingerie.
Team Brooklyn's plot is nasty and just plain mean (Jenny pretends that she's doing it for V but she's been lashing out at others all along, and at her own family members too! Misery loves company. Selfish B*t*h! Vanessa is just plain nasty and mean and soooooo jealous of Serena. BUT JULIET's kidnapping of Serena and leaving her drugged and God knows what else is psychotic! Juliet gets my respect (kow-tow to the dark mistress ..... and I'm really worried for Serena). Jenny behaved like Jenny would and Vanessa gets my disdain. Blair was right to part with Chuck, although i would have enjoyed a few more episodes of their sexcapades. And strong to want to be independent of Chuck. Career-wise. But we ALL know that she and Chuck belong together ultimately. Excited to watch Blair's journey into womanhood. More power to her. Chuck should grow too. And the writers should make sure that they grow towards each other. Throw in DAIR. That should jazz things up a bit. V is totally annoying. Even Jenny and Juliet were annoyed by her. (Last episode Dean Ruther spoke the perfect 3 little words to V : "Who are you???" Haha). The writers ARE up to speed with viewers' opinions. Btavo!


Texting Dean Ruther? "Official" withdrawal? Serena's a freshman with a bad record, and she's text-buddies with the dean? Oh pleaseeee.


Whoops didn't finish.
4. Did Chuck and Blair make the right decision?: I could totally relate. You need to be your own person before you can be with each other. Sometimes you get so lost in that person that you forget who you are and what you want in life.
5. Favorite couple: Derena, Serenate or Date?: Derena. When Serena was with Nate it was mostly physical. Serena is a much better person with Dan. It wasn't just physical either the way it was with Nate.


1. Favorite GG Quote: What do you say we go up in flames together?
2. Was Team Brooklyn's plot the most diabolical scheme in Gossip Girl history?: I agree with Gossip Guy
3. Biggest plot hole of the night: Nate and Dan not knowing that the girl they kissed wasn't Serena.


Why was Mrs. Archibald being so critical of Chuck, wasn't he Nate's best friend for how many years ? And lent them money in their time of need and was she not away of his recent good image with Eve?


Anyone else realise there names can spell: Va-J-J

Elise of the upper east side

after reading nymag's reality index (which I always read before any of the things on this website) I see that most of your 'opinions' are restating everything in the index! (ex: the thing about anne judging while her husband is in jail, and there are many more.) get some original opinions! this is disappointing that your answers are just statements nymag already made...

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Gossip Girl Season 4 Episode 9 Quotes

Hey Serena, it's me. I saw your thing in The Post. Just wanted you to know that Brooklyn is a great place to avoid nasty looks. Unless you throw your recycling in the regular trash or try to open a chain store with questionable labor practices.


Serena: Hey, why are you guys eating? I thought we were going to Sarabeth's.
Eric: Ah, we decided we could spread out better here. There's more room to work.
Serena: On what, your calculus homework?
Eric: Your love life. It's a little something called "Dan vs. Nate". We're here to help.
Elliot: And we brought protractors.