The Weekly Gossip Girl Reality Index 11/30/2010

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Last night's Gossip Girl, "Gaslit," was the kind of dark holiday episode we've come to expect, as our official review notes, setting the stage for the midseason finale.

It's time for one of our favorite pieces of Gossip Girl media coverage, N.Y. Magazine's traditional reality index. Excerpts from their take on Monday night's episode:

Dorota's Back!
  • Dorota on B's predicament: “With everything that’s happened with Mr. Chuck and Miss Serena, I also know you want to get out of the Dodge!” Plus 2.
  • Nate can’t wait until the lawyer is two feet away to open the (strangely unsealed) divorce papers being delivered to his mom. Plus 2.
  • Baby Anna! Plus 10.
  • Serena fails to recognize someone else posing as her OWN SELF in a photo. COME ON. Minus only 50, for the slim possibility that this is an inside meta joke about how all blond teenagers on the CW are interchangeable.
  • "Blair," Chuck gasps in fear as he spots Jenny on the landing above them at the hospital, and then they watch in tense silence as J walks by in a slow and weird manner, as if she is a zombie from The Walking Dead. Plus 3.
  • While everyone else on the show is a better schemer than Dan, it sort of makes sense that he’s the only one to suspect foul play. If there’s one thing he trusts more than all reality or facts, it’s the two orbs of trust just below Serena's face and above her bedazzled cummerbund. Plus 4.
  • Wait, Ben turns on Juliet for drugging Serena after plotting his revenge for years, forcing Juliet to give up everything, and beating the sh!t out of a random fellow prisoner? Minus 4. Also, since when was his hair so cute?
  • The doctor did a really good job of saying, "I hear you've had a good experience at the Ostroff Center," to Lily in a tone that conveyed, "I understand not just one but both of your children are fucked up, and while it is unquestionably your fault for bringing them up in the heart of such a shallow, immoral environment, you clearly did not know any better and thus I mostly pity you." Plus 5.

Steve Marsi is the Managing Editor of TV Fanatic. Follow him on Google+ or email him here.

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Gossip Girl Quotes

And who am I? That's one secret I'll never tell ... You know you love me. XOXO, Gossip Girl

Gossip Girl

[to Jenny] That's the thing. You need to be cool to be queen. Anne Boleyn thought only with her heart and she got her head chopped off. So her daughter Elizabeth made a vow never to marry a man. She married a country. Forget boys. Keep your eye on the prize, Jenny Humphrey. You can't make people love you, but you can make them fear you. For what it's worth, you're my Queen. I choose you.

Blair