Two and a Half Men Preview: Can 42 Million People Be Wrong?

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Can 42 million people be wrong? Not a chance, according to CBS, which hypes the massive Two and a Half Men viewer turnout for its first two season nine episodes in the preview below.

On Monday's new installments, meanwhile, Alan will offer dating advice to Walden, who is nervous about going out with Bridget; while Jake says he wants to drop out of school because, hey, that's what Walden did!

Check out the promo for "Big Girls Don't Throw Food" now.

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Two and a Half Men Quotes

Jake: If drinking makes you feel bad, why do you drink?
Charlie: Nobody likes a smart ass, kid.
Jake: You have to put a dollar in the swear jar. You said "ass."
Charlie: Tell you what. Here's a twenty. That ought to cover me until lunch

Woman [to Charlie about Jake]: You guys are really great together.
Charlie: Thanks.
Woman: Your wife must be proud.
Charlie: Oh, no, I'm not married.
Woman: Too bad.
Charlie: Wow, you're even better than a dog