Hawaii Five-0 Review: Out of The Pan, Into the Fryer

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"Alaheo Pau'ole:" Gone Forever.

Was this entire Hawaii Five-0 episode pieced together from spare parts of better episodes? There were so many disjointed pieces that I nearly got lost along the way. Given the non-sequitur nature of the hour, I’m just going to break down the main points.

A Hawaiian Wedding

Lori and Danny Handcuffed: Does anyone have any idea what point there was to this storyline? Furthermore, why did Steve feel the need to drop they key off the balcony? It all felt totally out of place.

We have not seen any indication that Lori and Danny would be romantically linked. What the heck is the “Jersey Slip” and why do you need to be handcuffed to another person for it to work? Finally, what type of horrible police officer is Danny that his handcuff key is not on a key ring of any sort... and he only has one in his possession? While I know some might fault Lori for not having her keys, she didn't bring her handcuffs, remember. They were Danny's.

Vincent Fryer, Chief of Detectives: I will take back every bad thing I said about Fryer as the head of Internal Affairs if they will just send him back! Watching Tom Sizemore violate the Miranda Rights of suspects with his “tough as nails abusive cop” overacting caused me physical pain. I now know how many of you anti-Lori fans must feel. It took all my will power not to throw something at the TV when he would spew dialog such as I have a badge that says I can do what ever I want. Makes me want to hurl just remembering it.

Then, just in case we need a reason for Fryer to be in the episode, we learn he 's gotten promoted to Chief of Detectives. Huh? what’s the Frak is “Chief of Detectives?” And regardless of what Fryer said, the head of an entire division of police would not be out busting down doors.

Joe White and Steve at Odds: I really don’t care who Shelburn is anymore. I’m so tired of the ring-around-the-rosy conversations that Steve and Joe are having about it. The story barely moves forward. If Steve really wanted to know what Joe was up to, he would have had Kono or Lori pull his cell phone records to see who he has been talking to and the facts would come flooding out. 

Then, you had Joe's last line of the episode: I was hoping you wouldn’t say that. It made one of my eyes twitch. Joe have you met Steve? He left his partner wearing handcuffs during a formalwear fitting; did you really think he was just going to drop the whole thing? 

Man Shot But Alive: I will commend the twist and turns this case took. As a whole, it was a decent concept for an investigation. However, as mentioned above, it would have been a better story without Sizemore’s Fryer tainting the scenery. It would have also been nice to see the wife walk in on the husband fresh from his coma, as having Kono and Steve telling the woman that her son was really dead as the lead in for Chin-Ho’s wedding was odd to say the least. 

Chin-Ho and Malia Got Married: That does lead us to the wedding. Ho'omaika'i (congratulations) to you both! I wish we had gotten more than four minutes of the episode dedicated to Chin-Ho and Malia. We had about 90 seconds of the guys in the fitting room and about two minutes of wedding montage. 

We're going to have to wait until 2012 to find out more about Shelburn and/or what happen to Hiro Yoshimura as Hawaii Five-O takes a break for the holidays.

Mr. Kurtzman, a great holiday gift for the fans would be to come back with an idea of what story you want to tell in an episode and go with it. You might also consider dialing back the ridiculousness as well. My eyes may hurt for months from all the rolling they did this week. 


Editor Rating: 3.1 / 5.0
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User Rating:

Rating: 3.7 / 5.0 (162 Votes)

Jim G. is a TV Fanatic Staff Writer. Follow him on Twitter.


I LOVE LORI. I don't know why many of you are complaining. Jeez, such hateful people. What's wrong with her being in the show? She's the only reason I'm watching H5O and not Castle, which I would NEVER have missed a show and now I do to watch H5O. So be quiet, if you dislike her so much, just stop watching the show. Man, this is getting to the point of annoyance how everyone is ahh, lori. I would love to see a little romance in show at least. Maybe that's what everyone needs, a little romance in there dull life.


@Zia....I was going to post the same thing about Grace in the scene with Kevin, and in many other eps as well. She can say more without even speaking.


Call me naive or optimistic, but I'm holding on to hope. I may be wrong and I'm prepared mentally for the worst. They aren't going to say anything bad about any actor/actress, that would be bad for them in signing in the future. They will say something like, Ms German has decide to leave H50 to pursue other opportunities and we thank her for her contribution to the show and wish her well in her future endeavors. That's the polite way of saying we really totally messed up.


Stills are out for 2.14. Not alot of them but still something.


@zia..I agree. I have sent complaints to cbs even though I know they are probably ignoring us. Our voices are all we have. Well and we could turn it off but I cant do that to the four core stars of this show. The concern I have that she is staying the whole season and possibly beyond. The reason being is Terry O quinns contract has been very well publicized for us to know his status. When his contracted epis were over it was released that he was signed on for 9 more epis. With LG there has been nothing. I am actually starting to think she was signed on as a permanent fixture.It makes me upset to say it but if that were not true why is there nothing about her status? It makes me really nervous. Yes Grace Park is awesome. She plays her role perfectly. And last nights epi was fantastic and a joy to know we did not have to persevere through lori popping in and out of scenes. I miss that. Last night showed what this season is missing.


@Martinelli and Amazingalex....I agree that we have a slim to none chance of getting this character taken off, but we can still voice our opinions. I enjoyed last nights repeat. Did you see how Grace Park was able to show caring and empathy towards a victim, (Kevin), that is real acting. The actress that plays Lori does not get that you can be a kickass female and still show believable empathy towards a victim, not the emotionless deer in the headlights stare which the Lori character has perfected. Its just too late to change this character. I am still holding out hope that they only signed her through episode 2-17 because they realize they can't repair the damage already done. I really want this show to succeed.


@Martinelli..oh yeah I think we have all accepted that. It is really upsetting but the fans have no power. All you can do is shut it off. I am not at that point yet but that could change. New epis look like they are gonna finally give us some answers so that is something to look forward to. Plus the return of danno's ex wife, daughter and katherine. At least we are getting back to the feel of season 1. That is a good thing.


@amazingalex - Let's face it, our chance to get rid of her are slim to none, you know that.


@martinelli..LOL!! Sounds perfect!!! Who was that one person??? Hmmm!! He apparently does not like any criticism for his show. Which can be understandable except the fans are what make a show a hit or a flop. He would do well to listen to all critiques good or bad. But what are ya gonna do?


@amazingalex - thanks for the warning but relax, I'm really diplomatic when it comes to tell people bad news. I will show him the other poll where 40 people voted and Lori has 1 single vote so far, lol. How about that? :) :)

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Hawaii Five-0 Season 2 Episode 12 Quotes

Danny: Good, let bye-gones be bye-gones, maybe you want to hug it out or fist bump:
Fryer: No, let's just work the case.

Tong: Those are dummy grenades
Danny: Ok, hang on to this. [hands grenade, pulls pin] If it's a dummy you will be fine, we'll be outside.
Tong: Wait! Fine, it's live
Chin Ho: You've been hanging around Steve too long.