Survivor Review: Appendicitis Claims Colton
Ding dong, the witch is dead. Karma’s a bitch. What comes around goes around.
Whatever cliché you want to use to describe what happened to Colton on Survivor this week it is best summed up by one word: Hallelujah. Colton’s departure makes Survivor: One World watchable again. We were getting close to the point of no return.
After a one week respite when Colton was not the most despicable person on earth, he returned to that mantle with a seemingly endless and totally unnecessary assault on Christina. Even worse he recruited a queen to sit alongside him and spit venom at Christina. Alicia’s got some work to do before she reaches Colton’s level, but she is on her way.
Or at least was on her way. Not that she’s incapable of being a jerk without Colton around, she is. She proved that early in the game with the way she reacted to Christina’s bargaining with the men in the early days. However, Alicia lacks the creativity and wit (and I don’t mean it as a compliment, but it is the correct use of the word) that could keep Colton going on and on far longer than necessary.
Instead by what can only be described as the grace of God, Colton is removed from the game due to an acute case of appendicitis. Realistically, this was the only way he was going to be sent home. With his unfortunate but obvious mental control of many players and with the idol it was going to take an epic blindside to get him out of the game.
On his way out Colton stays true to form and reveals his personality is not an act at all when he decides to take the immunity idol with him as a souvenir. The obvious alternative was to give it to his current closest confidant, Alicia. Or the noble move (if allowed) is to tell Jeff to give it to Sabrina because she gave it to him.
However, Colton is not noble. He’s immature and selfish. Instead of recognizing the good he could do for someone else by giving away the idol, he’s keeping it. For a souvenir. To me it doesn’t get more immature and selfish than that.
After Colton’s departure I let my mind wander to actually believe that Manono would somehow also go to tribal council and we might be able to get rid of Alicia as well. My excitement over that possibility over took the rational side of my brain which told me that they’ve never had a person medically removed from the game and someone else voted out in the same episode.
Instead we got a nice twist on the merge. Normally there’s tree mail and a feast. It was fun and exciting to see how quickly the players forget the food and get down to the game. On Survivor: One World the tribes were duped in to thinking they were voting someone off and had to go through the normal pre-tribal council scramble. All for nothing.
The beauty of this twist is the players are merging immediately after when these emotions over having to vote someone out were highest. Who knows if it’ll lead to anything, but it took the players off guard and is a good change from what they’ve done in the past.
The downside, of course, is that Alicia is unlikely to be a new target. She’ll quickly fall back in line with her five-woman alliance, even if that’s not enough to keep the alliance intact. What other choice does she have?
Christina, on the other hand, does have a choice. A big one. In all likelihood she’ll become the swing vote between the men and the women. As for any new tribe alliances, I don’t see it happening. Manono was down to the three men against Alicia and Salani never had to deal with their new, odd arrangements.
For better or for worse, we should prepare for a return to men against women. I’m a little disappointed just because to me it’s so obvious that’s what will happen. A more dynamic game where people feel more allegiance to their new tribe than their old, but still have some ties would have been ideal. Ah well, Colton’s gone, I’m happy.
More from this episode:
- At first I felt bad for Christina. And then she took the abuse. And then she took it some more. And then she... what? She let Colton lie in her lap? She tried to mother Colton? She thought this would curry favor with the devil himself?!?! Maybe she is this clueless.
- Speaking of clueless, I’m coming around on Kat. Her quote about eating dirt out of her nails and it being nutritious was hilarious. Then she outdid herself at tribal council talking about how worried she was about getting appendicitis. She’s not bright, but she’s a bit endearing.
- Did I mention I’m thrilled that Colton’s gone? Because I am. Just making sure that’s clear.