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Gossip Girl Review: Despicably High-Brow

by at . Comments

"Maybe you've been so busy worried about what everyone thinks that you forgot who you actually are. Which is a shame, because you should see what I see." - Dan

It's all about appearances, right? This week's Gossip Girl was all about the upper crust of the UES behaving badly - despicably if you will - in the name of getting what they want, for the sake of their respective reputations.

Meanwhile, the Humphrey men struggled to make sense of it all.

In a sense, "Despicable B" was like old times on Gossip Girl, with various stories of social scheming, though certain characters have arguably lost their way to the point where their actions cease to be believable.

Blair clearly has lost her way, somewhere between being traded for a hotel and selling out for a tiara. At least she admits as much, and has perhaps realizes at last that she can start being happy without preconditions.

Dair detractors may lament the couple's banality or lack of intense physical chemistry, but their connection runs deeper than the superficial. Going back to their days at W, Dan has loved Blair Waldorf for ... Blair Waldorf.

A Dair Picture

Dan always does his part. Whether or not you're a card-carrying member of Team Dair, you have to respect the genuine compassion, communication and respect between them. They are an equal partnership.

Fun as it was to see her so incredulous over Dan outshining her on the N.Y. Magazine Approval Matrix (a real, hilarious thing, even if Kim Kardashian's marriage lasting longer than B's isn't actually on it), our girl needs to regain her mojo. Strategizing to out-high-brow Dan at his own high-brow affair? Totally low-brow and beneath vintage B.

Dair's storyline had some wonderful moments - their heart-to-heart at the end, her botched attempt to generate interest from FIT, Dorota insisting B is still royalty to me! (FTW!) - but let's hope it marks a turning point.

She's got to know herself again, for real, and it'll be very interesting to see if Daniel Humphrey is by her side when she does. Who is the real B? Do any of us even know anymore? Just pray she tries to find her.

NOTE: It looks like B adopts an entirely different persona next week (see promo below).

Speaking of people unrecognizable from Season One ... when did Lily get so evil? Yes, she's always been materialistic, selfish and one to put on airs to a degree, but this level of vindictiveness is unprecedented.

If the whole plan all along was to nail Carol for fraud, well, kudos on the execution and all, but she'd already secured 50 percent of the estate, so what was the point? And why invite a reporter? To enhance her "image"? This is a woman who's been IN JAIL and married FIVE times. Pretty sure the reputation ship sailed long ago.

Notice she didn't deny paying off the nurse to sell out Ivy, either. That's just cold, Lil. Fortunately, Ivy proved her own goodness and/or naivete by tearing up the check at the end. Poor girl just wants a FAMILY! Not money!

Idiot. Did you see the zeroes on that thing?!

Rufus has clearly had it being lied to, and it's hard to blame the guy. He was always the trophy husband, but at least she was nice and they enjoyed each other's company. Now? Who knows who he's married to.

The problem with Lily's storyline was that unlike Blair's, it's just too complicated. Who can even keep track of all the lies and the reasons behind them, and at this point, are we emotionally invested in any of them?

Serena, Lily Pic

You know it's bad when William seems like a genuinely good guy just trying to do right by the four crazy women in his life. You almost feel bad for the guy. Maybe he'll figure out a way to leave all the money to Lola now.

Stranger things have happened ... on Gossip Girl.

Serena? She's just aimless at this point, a girl without a family, a real job, a boyfriend or much of a social life. It's sad, really, and makes you fear how low she'll go for attention in the next three weeks.

Perhaps the most significant (and most dubious) developments of the night came in the closing montage. First, Serena left the Gossip Girl server login info hanging out of her notebook! And Lola ganked it!

Week after week, characters one-up each other for biggest secret left out in the open. The people on this show need serious lessons in hiding sensitive information, because they make things too easy on lazy writers.

It's called a safe. Or a real doorman. Or a password on your iPhone. Or your pocket.

Okay, rant over. What do you think Lola will do with that info is the real debate. Give it back to the real G.G.? Become G.G. 4.0? Sell it back to Serena for her cut of the trust fund? Infinite, absurd possibilities.

Finally, Chuck Bass has been through about as many paternity twists as Gossip Girl has identity crises. Thanks to the busiest P.I. in the city and some (sexy!) mind games from Nate, we know Diana's a fraud.

You gotta love Nate going to bat for his friend and his company, while treating female fans to some gratuitous shirtless action to boot. Well played, Mr. Archibald ... and those who guessed Jack is Chuck's dad.

In real life, Desmond Harrington is 35 and Ed Westwick 24, BTW. A bit of a stretch. But if Chuck graduated high school just three years ago and Jack is around 40 ... we'll buy. Again, this is Gossip Girl people.

It STILL doesn't explain what Diana's angle is, though, and it starts to lose some of its punch when a huge bombshell is simply negated the following week. On a routine basis. Oh, yeah. That was a lie. Great.

Think he's actually Chuck's dad? And Elizabeth the mother after all? If so, why all the subterfuge? What's really going on here, and will the ultimate resolution to this ongoing saga finally be worth it?

We have our doubts, but here's hoping. Before we turn it over to your comments, here's next week's promo:

What did you think of tonight's Gossip Girl? Sound off now!

Review

Editor Rating: 3.5 / 5.0
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User Rating:

Rating: 4.5 / 5.0 (790 Votes)

Steve Marsi is the Managing Editor of TV Fanatic. Follow him on Google+ or email him here.

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GossipGirlFan, to quote Blair "...somehow between being traded for a hotel and selling out for a tiara I lost my true self but I wanna be found, could you possibly help me?" Since your name claims you are a fan of the show, you should know Dan's response to that statement @W magazine. Feel free to also cast your mind back to season 4 and where Dan sabotaged B and got both of them fired from W before he righted his wrong. Did you per chance say she wasn't pining over Chuck? Do you remember Raina and how Blair was pining over Chuck and oblivious/in denial over his feeling for Raina? I think I am now convinced Ban fans started watching the show from 4th or 5th season.

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Blair has realised she has become a lesser version of herself and has acknowledged that her toxic relationships with Louis and Chuck are to blame. She knows Dan loves her for her and can help her become the strong, independent woman she was. So my question is if she knows all this why would she want to go back to Chuck who has essentially turned her into a person she doesn't like and is trying to fix?

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W showed she was all this things. she got the place at w with no connections but her own determination. she sabotaged her competition classic Blair. she replaced epperly and treated her interns as minions. she was definitely not lost Blair then probably due to her friendship with Dan and the fact she wasn't pining over Chuck for once

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Blair may have lost herself after Chuck traded her for a hotel. Dan fell for the strong and independent Blair who is capable of anything. Her time at

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She said that she and Chuck couldn't be together yet because she needed to be Blair Waldorf first - she isn't that person now! So it feels like she's just rediscovering herself so that she can be ready to be with Chuck, so that she can be strong and secure in herself and admit her own part in their downfall so that they can move on. If Dan helps her do that, then so be it - he has been a great FRIEND to her.
All these reasons as to why she's acting as she is and why she's so happy now with Dan are all contradictory and don't add up! I'd be a lot more believing if I felt like there was any substance to the arguments.

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People have got to stop saying that Blair and Dan are 'equals' in their relationship! They simply aren't because Blair is this sad excuse of herself - which she has even acknowledged. They can not be equal while Blair is struggling to find herself, to rediscover her ambition and to regain her confidence.
Those scenes where it's just the two of them and they're being sweet are just that - sweet. But the true B loves to be the respected, admired Queen of society and she hasn't been able to achieve this recently, even with Dan etc. Maybe she will get there but she HAS NOT YET.
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GossipGirlFan I wish Dan was as forgiving and understanding of Serena when he also claimed to love the real her. @ your comment, "Dan fell for her strength and independence": Dan claimed he fell in love with Blair while they were both at W magazine. That period was when Blair claimed she lost herself since it came after Chuck traded her for a hotel/She chose to trade sex for a hotel without knowing she had been traded+ selling out for a tiara to live her princess dream. In a nutshell, Dan loves the lost Blair.

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Dair are cute they just don't work on GG any other show but their relationship makes Blairs character bomb completely.
Dair fans are Dan fans not Blair cos this version of her is pitiful. Unfortunately the writers don't see it.
I just want the super Blair back and this thing with Dan just doesn't work on this show.
Blair and Serena BFF's for endgame and a new found friendship with Chuck he's going to need it!

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I definitely believe Blair can find her true self with Dan. He truly loves Blair for Blair. Having been on the receiving end of many a Waldorf scheme he knows she has a dark side but recognises that it is her own insecurities that feed it. Her relationships with Chuck and Louis have reduced her to a shadow of her former self because she was literally living in their shadows. She became Chuck's property and Louis's prisoner but with Dan she can finally be with someone who sees her as his equal and who loves the fact that they are equal. He knows her latest scheme is fuelled by her own self-doubt and he tells her how strong and independent she is. Dan fell for her strength and independence and when she sees herself through his eyes it makes her want to be the better version of herself.

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@Elisa
I agree with you. You can not expect big changes by the end of the season. But what has been announced should happen. Dan should tell Blair that he loves her and that she does not answer to him what he expected. This is one of the changes that can disrupt between Dan and Blair, who is scheduled to be the end of the season. Also, going or not going to Rome by Dan should happen, and this can have consequences compared to Blair and Dan. And of course, for me a very important issue which the two boys will have a romance with Serena until the end of the season?