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Hawaii Five-0 Review: A Very Cold March

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"Kanalua:" Doubt.

Know that I don’t say this lightly: This was one of the worst episodes of Hawaii Five-0 I have ever watched. After last week’s stellar Season 3 opening I’m absolutely appalled at how this episode went down.

I'll explain why...

August March: After waiting months for the return of Ed Asner as August March, I’m most disgusted with how his departure was designed. This is a man who has always thought two steps ahead of two generations of cops. Yet he decides to punch his own ticket by stepping into traffic. Seriously?!? Why were there not cops escorting him? Why was he allowed to just step out of the car on the passenger side and stroll across the grass into the path of a truck? Come on!

Catherine Getting Info: I’m all for Catherine using her feminine charms to get stuff from guys, that’s to be expected from the hotness that is Michelle Borth. But what self-respecting Naval Officer is going to hack into the WITSEC computer database by stealing the password from some poor schmuck in a bar?

Catherine Helps McGarrett

Ridiculous Computer Security: Speaking of getting info from some poor schmuck at a bar. First, the Government requires numbers, letters and a special character in all of their passwords. Second, I can tell you that none of my passwords have anything do with my childhood pet, family street or anything to do with me growing up. So between those two things, you are not going to hack a government database by asking a guy his life story over pool and randomly plugin random words he said.  

Muddled Case: From the art theft, to the suspect dying, to the getaway driver being murdered, to it all leading to a kidnapping... it was just too much. I wasn't attached to the art, or the car driver, and only cared about the girl because she was a kid. Hell, I never even figured out what August went to ask the fence for since he was the one who shot the brothers with the same gun he used last time. Add to that mix Chin Ho dealing with Malia’s death and Catherine stealing government passwords, and it becomes one giant pile of what I like to call "A Hot Mess."

Speaking of Chin Ho, the only decent part of this episode was Chin-Ho’s dealing with Malia’s death. The funeral was beautiful, and then he and Danny talking at the end was a great moment. I was glad to see Danny step-up and be a friend and family for Chin-Ho; if anyone knows how alone he might feel it would be Danny. 

But in the end, one good portion of an episode can not offset all the bad. Oh, and don’t even get me started on Kamekona new "venture" or the  lift and thrust ratios of the average touring helicopter – we will be here for days! GAH!

Here is hoping that next week we get back to a decent story plot and we get more information on Doris still being on the island. For now, I’m going to see if I can find some brain bleach to wash this episode from my mind. 

Review

Editor Rating: 2.9 / 5.0
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User Rating:

Rating: 3.9 / 5.0 (148 Votes)

Jim G. is a TV Fanatic Staff Writer. Follow him on Twitter.

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I agree with you. Episode 2 was such a let down. The premiere was a great start to the season and I had high hopes for this episode. Malia's funeral and Chin Ho's dealing with it were the only beautiful part of the show. Other than the it's just blend. The case itself seemed like something HPD could handle. I'm very disappointed with the second episode. Hopefully, next week will be better.

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I actually enjoyed this episode, I have missed the crime of the week structure and I'm happy they could continue the story arcs around some banter, surprises and good old action. I finished watching it thinking, wow that was good, just like the Five-0 from previous seasons. I don't know what you guys are thinking.

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This show is safe because it has signed a syndication deal so no matter what it has a 90% chance of renewal no matter what ratings it gets, I would say if it gets up into the 2.0's again which it should always be at no matter what it will be safe.

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Worst ever--enough said?! Looks like season three will be the last.

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Totally agree with you. The show is beyond rediculous. I can't believe how they used Catherine. Danny is becoming as usless as Lori and the most annoying character on the show. Just awful.

Hawaii Five-0 Season 3 Episode 2 Quotes

Danny: Going to need a vest, vest please.
Steve: You don't even know what my plan is.
Danny: This is true, but I know you, and any plan you have will involve me and serious bodily harm.
Steve: What are you talking about?
Danny: What I'm talking about, is that over the years our marriage has become predictable.

Steve: Catherine, I want you to help me find my mom.
Catherine: I thought you told Witness Protection you wanted kept secret even from you.
Steve: Yeah, that was before I found out she had a chance to kill Wo Fat and let him get away.

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