Royal Pains Review: Birthday Wish

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My birthday wish for "Game of Phones" was an episode that delivered on its promises, along with a compelling storyline.

Better luck next year, Royal Pains?

Travel to Italy

I guess that's not much different than the huge bag of nothing that Evan received for his big day. Then again, it was very much his own fault. Evan's grandiose expectations cut him off at the knees before he even got up to walk. 

Shouldn't someone have caught on to his constant repetition of Divya's words about going to Tuscany in the first place? I don't think it could have been any more obvious that he was trying to hint at something.

If I had to sum up what happened in this episode, it's that everyone, to some extent, got really caught up in their own stuff, from Evan's self-obsession to Hank's drug problem to Paige's jealousy and even Divya's pregnancy... they all had very self-interested moments.

Paige's was probably the most ridiculous, only to be overshadowed by Evan's Tuscan-inspired expectations. The fact she thinks, though hasn't really admitted, that she believes there's something going on between Evan and Divya is absolutely absurd. I have never seen a couple's honeymoon period end so abruptly. Please get this makeup over with quickly. Paige married someone who infamously puts his foot in his mouth; she should automatically consider that any time there's an issue between them. It would save them a lot of misunderstanding and us as the audience a lot of wasted story lines.

Divya's story this week was one I really enjoyed. And by enjoyed, I mean all of the parts that did not include Evan. I thought the renewed relationship between Divya and her mother and their discussion about motherhood was really nice. I was kind of surprised that her mom dropped a pending engagement in Divya's lap, but it went okay with the theme of big secrets going on there and evened things out nicely in that way.

Once again, I harp on the fact that the whole Hank-the-pain-killer-addict thing didn't pan out in either a confession or a test proving such is the case, as the promo somewhat mistakenly promised. No, not all promos are supposed to spill the beans or promise certain things will come to pass, but when will we finally address and deal with Hank's clear problem. 

Perhaps next week? What did you think of this installment?


Editor Rating: 3.9 / 5.0
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User Rating:

Rating: 2.7 / 5.0 (37 Votes)

C. Charles is a TV Fanatic Staff Writer. Follow her on Twitter.


...I miss Dr Sarcani, I hope I spelled that right and Hank and Evan's father. More of them, please.


I never comment on the Royal Pains review. Never thought the need. However, I will say the Molly teenager is the most bratty teenager I have ever seen on TV. I am thinking they will come up with some diagnosis maybe Bipolar for her antics which might explain why they have this character on the episodes, otherwise I don't get it. Paige/Evan/Divya is worrisome but Paige obviously doesn't feel as if something is going on between them but more like she has been estranged from Evan. Paige has always felt as if her and Evan are fated but reality is setting in and they are going to have to grow with each other. Marriage is hard even for the beautiful people. Hank's pain addiction storyline is nowhere near far fetched. There are way too many people in the medical community who are addicted to controlled substances, this is an on going problem even for the so called perfect people. The writers want to dirty Hank up a bit, nothing wrong with that. I miss Dr Sarcani, I hope I spelled that right and Hank and Evan's father. More of them, please.


Hank has made some poor choices - telling the cop (his patient) he was still on pain medication; offering a ride to the cop's troubled daughter, and giving the daughter a controlled substance that was issued to him. And he's such a busybody. I guess that's easier than dealing with his own issues. I thought it was fun that Evan thought his birthday celebration was in Italy. Evan is a kid at heart and I like his character. I hope he and Paige will talk about what's bugging them in the next episode.


(continued from above) He clearly saw the path he was heading down & got out of there. However, as he left he also obviously winced at pain in his head & neck. I hope he finds the right treatment to get him fully recovered.


I agree, this episode was all over the place. First, people need to quit harping on Molly. Frankly, I find the father/daughter pair boring, but she's a teenager. She is going to both love her dad & drive him nuts doing dumb stuff. It's just what teens do. Not being familiar with pain meds, I don't know whether her "meltdown" over her dad was realistic or not, but it isn't fair to bash her for telling the cops what happened. Hank rescued her & the only pain meds he had on him were his own. Unfortunately, it sounds as if Shelby wasn't aware at all that he was still taking anything since his brain surgery. That could be a problem whether Hank really has a serious addiction or not. On that note, I'm not convinced he IS addicted. Yes, he started to become dependent, but he walked out of the pain clinic when the other guy asked if he was an "oxy guy". He clearly saw the path he was heading down & got out of there. However, as he left he also obviously winced at pain in his head & neck. I hope he finds the right treatment to get him fully recovered.


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I think they gave Hank the “addicted to pain killers� story line because they can’t seem to find a solid love interest for the character – either the actress or the character doesn’t work out for whatever reasons. I think for this season they just decided to table it and replace it with drugs. This hasn’t really worked out either so maybe they will be able to find Hank a woman next season and get back on track. I haven’t hated the season as so many others have. It seems pretty much the same quality as previous ones to me. I will admit I think the Paige/Evan/Divya drama is blatant plot device. Ever since day one Hank, Evan, and Divya have been siblings. Plain and simple. They may not have been born of the same mother and father but those three are siblings and it’s part of what has made the show so enjoyable. To try to turn that around in order to create unnecessary drama is insulting to the core fans. Writers, resolve this quickly and never try it again.


Did not enjoy last night's episode - definitely fast-forwarded through the brat Molly scenes. She supposedly is concerned about her father and she's giving him more stress than anything or anyone.
Evan was his usual goofy self - not funny and the Hank addicted to pain meds does nothing for me.
This show started out with a really fun, unique concept and has gone downhill.


Happy Birthday to you!
Thanks for reviewing.
Molly is really a brat and I'm not sure that pain killers would have that effect on anyone? Wouldn't it just make you go to sleep?


My issue with Hank's addiction to pain medication is that it is one of the big storylines that they put out there in the beginning, then dropped for several weeks before picking it up again. They've done the same thing with the Boris storyline over the years, as well as others. I get that they have to juggle several things, but that doesn't mean they have to drop it altogether. It would take just 2 seconds to show Hank downing a pill in every episode in between. And what have they done with Paige's character? She was level-headed, but fun. Now she's just coming off as neurotic. This has been a disappointing season for me, but I'll still hang in with the series.

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Royal Pains Season 5 Episode 10 Quotes

Whoever this is, this baby, is making me better. Challenging me.


It's like we're out of sync.