Family Guy

Sundays 9:00 PM on FOX
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Herbert is the creepy pedophile neighbor on Family Guy.  He's always hitting on his favorite paper boy, Chris Griffin... and just about anyone else he can.

Herbert Quotes

Mort: What kind of birdhouse can you build with popsicles, roofies, and a rubber mallet?
Herbert: It's for a rare African bird called "none your business."

Herbert: Well Jessie I guess we gotta find some other way to spend our evenings.
TV announcer: And now back to ESPN's exclusive coverage of the little league world series.
Herbert: Ohhh JACKPOT!

Family Guy Quotes

North Dakota, we're not even the best Dakota!

Peter

Hi, I'm Wilford Brimley and I have diabetes. It hurts me to pee and it causes me to be short with my family. I can't sleep at night. The other day I stubbed my toe and took it out on the dog. And two weeks ago I ran out of vanilla ice cream and struck my wife. Then I find out my wife has been dead for six years. Who the hell did I hit?

Wilford Brimley