Ted Crisp

Jay Harrington stars as the title character Ted Crisp on ABC's Better Off Ted.  Ted is at the senior VP of R&D at the fictitious Veridian Dynamics.  Ted is handsome, charming and damn good at his job.  The only problem is Ted's ethical side sometimes gets in the way of his evil company's plots.

Ted is a single father raising his daughter alone because his wife left him to go be a hippie in Africa.

Ted Crisp Quotes

Okay, people, we need to turn this simple festive gourd into a killer. I've asked Dr. Bamba to take a look at how Nature does it, because Nature is a fantastic killer of things

Ted

Veronica: We want to weaponize a pumpkin.
Ted: Then so do I. Because?
Veronica: There's a country with whom we do business that grows a great deal of pumpkins and would welcome additional uses for them. As well as cheaper ways to kill their enemies.
Ted: Well, finally the pumpkin gets to do something besides Halloween.
Veronica: Pie.
Ted: Halloween and pie

Ted Crisp Photos

Show Comments

Better Off Ted Quotes

Okay, people, we need to turn this simple festive gourd into a killer. I've asked Dr. Bamba to take a look at how Nature does it, because Nature is a fantastic killer of things

Ted

Veronica: We want to weaponize a pumpkin.
Ted: Then so do I. Because?
Veronica: There's a country with whom we do business that grows a great deal of pumpkins and would welcome additional uses for them. As well as cheaper ways to kill their enemies.
Ted: Well, finally the pumpkin gets to do something besides Halloween.
Veronica: Pie.
Ted: Halloween and pie

Better Off Ted

Better Off Ted Photos

  1. Shows
  2. Better Off Ted
  3. Cast
  4. Ted Crisp