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mine is "the only straight i am is a straight up bitch" and "legend has it when i came out of my mother i told the nurse she was fat." <---those are my top two, but there are others i like to. SANTANA 4EVER!! :)
This is going to be a long list perhaps:
"Only Straight I am is straight up bitch"
"I've gotta gay"
"Yes you should move to Israel"
"You know why? Because we'z be going to breadstix!"
"Look, My dad's a doctor and not a "tooth doctor" a real one, he like went to college or something, which means I have a killer health plan that pretty much covers anything, and me and Britts wants to get our anthesia on!"
"Oh come on! You love me. I keep it real and I'm hilarious!"
"I'm a closeted lesbian and a judgemental bitch!"
"I was asked to join the golf team!"
"Do I smell like a golf course?"
"Oh please, you have wierd puffy pyramid nipples! You could dust them off with powdered sugar and they could pass for some sort of desert!"
these might not be exact since they are from the top of my head