Two and a Half Men

Thursdays 8:30 PM on CBS
Two and a half men
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Charlie, Alan and Jake Promo Shot
A Two and a Half Men promotional photo of the three principal cast members, Charlie (Charlie Sheen), Alan (Jon Cryer) and Jake (Angus T. Jones).

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Two and a Half Men Quotes

Charlie: Oh, try MalibuPuddingGirls.com.
Alan: Pudding Girls?
Charlie: Trust me.
Alan: Oh ... ew.

Charlie: You're like an Alzheimer's patient in a whorehouse.
Alan: What do you mean?
Charlie: You're constantly surprised that you're getting screwed, and you don't want to pay for it