You take a woman's power away. Her work, her family her currency. You leave her with one coin...the one she was born with. It may be tawdry and demeaning, but if she has to, she will spend it. But you're right, your feelings count too.
No, in your heart of hearts, you know as well as I do, red velvet is bullsh*t. It tastes like Play-Doh. It is not velvety. And the only thing that's good about it is the cream cheese frosting, which is mean to live on top of carrot cake, like God intended.