Thursdays 8:30 PM on CBS
Two-and-a-half-men

Jake: Are we going to dinner tonight?
Alan: Do I look like I'm in shape to go to dinner?
Jake: I don't know, I'm not a doctor


Rating: 5.0 / 5.0 (1 Vote)
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Related Quotes:
Two and a Half Men Quotes, Two and a Half Men Season 3 Episode 1 Quotes, Alan Harper Quotes, Jake Harper Quotes
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Two and a Half Men Season 3 Episode 1 Quotes

Charlie: Mixing those pills with alcohol is really a bad idea.
Alan: Not if you're trying to kill yourself

Charlie: Hey, buddy, how you been?
Jake: Life stinks.
Charlie: Cheer up, you're still a kid. It gets much worse

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