Sebastian: I heard you were a true physician, but you're as rude as a barber, surgeon. Are you a menace?
Dr. Wainwright: I must have misplaced them, perhaps in the same dark cabinet where you keep your morals.

Like piggies at the trough, little knowing how soon they'll be led to the slaughter. Some of them have their uses, true enough, I suppose. Mr. Hawthorne will make a fine puritan beard for us to wear; greedy and easily manipulated, so he will live. Young Mather, on the other hand, he's harmless...hardly! Filled with passion and ideals, there's very little more dangerous than that combination. No, he must die so young Mather can join his father in Hell. And of course, the handsome Dr. Wainwright, he should die first of all. Too fearless, too intelligent, above all, too curious, wouldn't you agree? After all as you'll soon learn, if you've not already, it's precisely sacrifice that fuels our work. You might say that sacrificing what we most love is the key to opening all doors.

Countess Marburg

Peggy: Don, listen to me. What did you ever do that was so bad?
Don: I broke all my vows. I scandalized my child. I took another man's name and made nothing of it.

You have such a rare talent, stop looking over your shoulder at what other people have.

Stan

There's more to live than work.

Stan

Joan: That's the tip of the iceberg, Peggy.
Peggy: I never know if that's good or bad.

Betty: Don, honey, I appreciate your intentions, I really do, but I'm not going to waste the rest of my time arguing about this. I want to keep things as normal as possible, and your not being here is part of that.
Don: [crying] Oh. Birdie I...
Betty: [crying] I know.

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Betty: Please don't let your pride interfere with my wishes.
Don: I'm their father.

Ooh. That's fast. I feel like someone just gave me some very good news.

Joan

If mommy's purse didn't belong in the microwave, why did it fit?

Ralph

Principal Skinner: You're not supposed to be able to get outside our network.
Nelson: You shouldn't have made your password, "password".
Principal Skinner: It was the name of the street I grew up on, Password Drive.

Willie: What's that?
Principal Skinner: We didn't want to leave you out of the digital revolution. Willie, meet your new supervisor.
Willie: I have to take orders from a machine?
Principal Skinner: Oh it can't speak, but should it ever learn, yes.