Abed Quotes (Page 9)
Season 1, Episode 23: "English as a Second Language"
Troy: I think I got half of it, which got me through the half I didn't.
Abed: Like the first season of The Wire.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 1, Episode 22: "Modern Warfare"
Abed: Come with me if you don't wanna get paint on you.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Abed: To be blunt, Jeff and Britta is no Ross and Rachel. Your chemistry and sexual tension are putting us all on edge, which is ironically, and hear this on every level, you're keeping us from being friends.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 1, Episode 21: "The Art of Discourse"
Abed [on his porn name]: Henry David Thoreau Diet Squirt.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Abed: He still assumes I'm a terrorist.
Pierce: If you're not, I'm sorry. If you are, I'm a hero. I'm willing to take that chance.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 1, Episode 20: "Contemporary American Poultry"
Dean: Do you know who might have stolen a box of hair nets from the kitchen?
Abed: Someone with hair.
Dean: I'm gonna write that down.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Abed: Do you know why I'm here?
Jeff: You got caught with a fake bachelor degrees by the way, they started using that as a mid season arc on Law and Order. Total rip off.
• Rating: 3.3 / 5.0
Pierce: abed, Your social skills aren't exactly streets ahead, know what I mean?
Abed: I don't.
Jeff. you're not alone in this case. Pierce, stop trying to coin the phrase, streets ahead
Pierce: Trying? Coined and minted.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Abed: The minute before you thought about busting us, that was the minute you had chicken in your hands.
• Rating: Unrated
Abed: His dreadlocks remind me of the Predator, which is weird because you're doing the actual hunting, and you seem invisible to him.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
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Total Quotes: 116
