Parks and Recreation

Thursdays 8:30 PM on NBC
Parks and recreation
TV Fanatic Works Better with Prime Instant Video
Try it Now for Free and Instantly Watch Parks and Recreation.

Ann: You just hired me like eight seconds ago.
April: Wow, you're doing a really bad job.

Leslie: See there's more things to look at on the internet other than naked guys Ann.
Ann: What?

Leslie: Ben, my campaign manager and I, have made a decision.
Ann: We've decided to fire that campaign manager, me.
Leslie: And hire you.

Ron: Ben and a much larger Ann. She definitely loves Ann.
Ann: Awwwww.

Just put your damn candy out!

Donna: So, I made my desk out of silver M&Ms, but they do not make silver M&Ms so I spray painted them.
Ann: Okay, so those are poisonous, so no one eat them.
Andy: Yeah, duh!
Ann: Go throw up.
Andy: I didn't eat any.
Ann: Go throw up.

Leslie: Ann, I need you to text me every thirty seconds that everything is going to be okay.
Ann: Okay!
Leslie: [Phone rings] Thanks Ann!

I bought this Mackerel at the Supermarket. I've been standing in the water with the fish on my hook for 30 minutes. I saw it on an episode of I Love Lucy. Pathetic? Maybe, but it feels pretty good to have a bunch of little boys be super in to me. That came out wrong.

Chris: Ann Perkins you really know your testes!
Ann: ...thank you?

Leslie: Do you need to get that?
Ann: No, it's just penises.

Leslie: And you have an officemate, his name is Stewart. And he's kind of a grouch.

Ann: I have an officemate?

Stewart: Get these f-ing balloons out of here.

Yeah, I snuck an Al Green song in there. I want them to get together, sue me.

Displaying quotes 25 - 36 of 107 in total

Parks & Rec Quotes

Time is money, money is power, power is pizza, and pizza is knowledge, let’s go!

April

Andy: From now on, we will be using code names. You can address me as
Eagle One. Ann, code name -- Been There, Don That. April is --
Currently Doing That. Donna is -- It Happened Once in a Dream; Chris,
code name -- If I Had To Pick a Dude. Ben is -- Eagle Two.
Ben: Oh thank God.