Leslie: Would you be cool doing things that a prostitute does?
Ann: Uh...
Leslie: Minus the money?
Ann: Definitely yes then.

Ann: I don't think I should go out with you.
Chris: Can I ask you why not? Because I thought we had a great time the night you got drunk and kissed me. And... you did use your tongue.

Ann: You have two broken bones in your right arm, and four in your hand.
Andy: That's the side that hurts.

Ann: Do you think anybody's going to show up?
Leslie: A) Yes. B) Even if they don't, we'll just put the concert on ourselves. But C) Yes, yes. They're definitely going to show up. Although D) Maybe not.

Traditionally, when I end a long-term relationship, I'm a little fragile, and I have a tendency to do some reckless things. So I need to stay away from Chris.

Tom: We need to do something to distract from this... boring area. Now I didn't want to have to do this but we may have to go nude.
Ann: Goodbye, Tom.

Tom: In a million years, I never thought you'd be the problem with this photo shoot.
Ann: Didn't you just plan this like two hours ago?

Tom: Come on, Ann, what are we doing? Maxim or Good Housekeeping?
Ann: I'm not sure which one is the insult.

Chris: I'd love to chat with you. Can I call you?
Ann: You have my phone number?
Chris: No, you couldn't remember your phone number. But you gave me your phone.

Ann: Hey, Ron. Did we make out last night?
Ron: Good god, woman. No.

I loved Andy. Loved him. Loved Andy. He was a totally helpless baby when we met. I dated him for three years. Now he's an adult with a job. And some other girl is going to reap the rewards of my hard work? That's [expletive].

Ann: Let me ask you something. I'm hot.
Andy: Is that a question?

Parks & Rec Quotes

Ron: Indianapolis is home to Charles Mulligan's Steakhouse, the best damn steakhouse in the damn state. I have taken a picture of every steak I've ever eaten there. June 2004: Porterhouse, medium rare, Bearnaise sauce. January 2000: They call this one, The Enforcer. February '96: The steak ribeye. The Whiskey: Lagavulin 16. The lady next to me? A bitch. Specifically, my ex-wife Tammy. OK, this is the first I ever went there. Look at me. Just a kid.

Time is money, money is power, power is pizza, and pizza is knowledge, let’s go!

April