NCIS
Mondays 8:00 PM on CBSAnthony (Tony) DiNozzo Quotes
Bishop: No, Daniel Coyne is a victim. Whoever else has been targeted is a victim. You're a terrorist, and you're going to serve fifty years in federal prison.
Tony: Minimum.
Pace: They're incredible, these weapons I've helped build. You sit behind a computer monitor. Point, click and thousands of miles away, total destruction. Parsa thinks it's only fair we get a taste.
Tony: Wow. Wowsers.
Diane: This is not what it looks like.
Fornell: Right. We were just...
Gibbs: No. I do not need the details.
Tony: I wouldn't mind a few details.
Tony: Raise your arms. Please. Ma'am. Just remember I have mouths to feed. Two goldfish. I'm their only source of income. They're awfully cute.
Porter: Relax, DiNozzo. I'm as anxious about this as you are.
Tony: So you got twenty-five pages of national security strategy from inside a breakfast cereal.
Allie: In order to better prepare for attacks I dream up threats that haven't happened yet.
Tony: This dream came true.
Flynn: Jeff Daniels wasn't in Tron, that was Jeff Bridges.
Tony: Flynn, you are a fan.
Bishop: Actually, I should get back to NSA.
Tony: You're not getting off that easy. Gibbs likes rules too. #45: always clean up your mess.
Bishop: It doesn't make any sense.
Tony: What now, Russell Crowe? Hasn't your beautiful mind gotten you in enough trouble today?
McGee: You ever going to get a new car?
Tony: Well, firstly I never buy new cars. Secondly, I need something that ignites my passions. It's like a woman: I need to be in love before I commit.
McGee: You've never committed to a woman.
Tony: Listen, I know I made fun of you in the past for riding the bus, but I have to admit I was wrong. I've been using public transporation and I really like it.
McGee: You're kidding.
Tony: No. I have time to read, make some calls....and best of all, I get to watch people. People are fascinating.
McGee: Okay Tony I'm...I don't even know what I am right now. But I know you, and this is not you.
Gibbs: DiNozzo - check out Olivia Chandler.
Tony: With pleasure. Thank you boss.
Lodge owner: I swear, the old witch is psychic. If I have so much as a thought of another woman...
Tony: You don't have to answer that.
Lodge owner: I have to.
McGee: Tony what's going on? Do you have a drinking problem?
Tony: No. No, I just....I joined this men's support group. Meets in the church hall two nights a week.
McGee: You serious?
Tony: Uh huh. I know - it doesn't sound like me. But, with the past year I just wanted to shake things up a little bit. Meet some new people. This guy at the gym told me about the group and I thought it sounded like a good idea. And it is. It's fun. The Rev drove me to Quantico the other morning. Interesting guy. He's helping me be less judgemental.