Anthony (Tony) DiNozzo Quotes
Vance: I'd go with the cat.
Abby: Yes, most of us would, but WMD.
Abby: What would McGee do?
Tony: That's two Ws, Abs.
- Permalink: Whatever.
Man I wish I could have seen Rivera's face when Gibbs laid the smack down. You think he had a little chin quiver going on? I love a good bad guy chin quiver.
- Permalink: I love a good bad guy chin quiver.
Bishop: When my grandma died, it helped me just to talk about her. Maybe you guys could tell me what Jackson was like.
Abby: He gave the best hugs.
McGee: He was the only one that could the Gibbs stare at Gibbs.
Tony: With those icy blue eyes. He gave me the sweater off his back once. White. Two functional pockets. Very soft.
- Permalink: Reminiscing about Jackson.
Vance: Put it away.
Tony: Oh. Excuse me, sir. I'll be right back in. I was just going to call---
Vance: I know what you're doing Agent DiNozzo and I said stop.
Tony: With all due respect sir, I think Gibbs would want the update.
Vance: You brief him, he'll be back at his desk before lunch.
Tony: That's his call.
Vance: No, it's my call. Gibbs needs time. It's my job to make sure he takes it.
Tony: Anyone else I would agree sir, but Leroy Jethro Gibbs?
Vance: Can you handle point on this or not?
Tony: Of course I can.
Vance: Good. Then inform your team, Agent DiNozzo. Gibbs stays where he is. No contact. Are we clear?
Tony: Clear as a bell, sir.
McGee: Abby, this email came through two minutes ago.
Tony: Two minutes is two years in Abby time. You know that.
- Permalink: Two minutes is two years in Abby time. You know that.
Vance: Any questions?
Tony: Just one. Why?
Admiral Kendall: I've been asking myself that for years. Amanda was valedictorian in high school. Straight A's in college. Georgetown. And then she suddenly flunked out. She spent the last two years wasting her life jet-setting across Europe with a group of international trust fund brats, partying in every capital in the continent.
Tony: Well maybe she just needed to find herself, sir.
Admiral Kendall: Well now it's gone too far.
- Permalink: Now, go fetch my wayward daughter.
McGee: What do you get if you kick a dog? Trip to Hawaii?
Tony: Death by Abby.
- Permalink: Death by Abby.
Tony: Oui, oui, monsieur. Je suis very special Agent DiNozzo.
Ducky: The French do see arrogance as a virtue. So you'll be welcome there. But remember: in France, only tip 6%.
- Permalink: Ducky's tips for France.
Tony: Are you flirting with me at a crime scene, Inspector?
Inspector Cheblis: No. Maybe, I don't know. Does it matter?
Tony: Your timing could be better.
Inspector: Maybe you're only uncomfortable because you're not used to being a witness.
- Permalink: French flirtation.
Tony: And you're welcome, by the way.
Amanda: For what?
Tony: For saving your bony ass, Princess Leia.
- Permalink: Under-appreciated DiNozzo.
Tony: You know what I think? I think you're not some brain-dead little party girl. I think that all of this is an act. And I think you are some kind of spy, working for Amir and the Iranian government. Am I crazy?
Amanda: Half crazy, Tony. I am a spy. But Amir works for me, and I work for the same people you do.
- Permalink: Tony's not completely crazy.
McGee: I'm not spending the night out here, Tony. I'm cold and I'm starving.
Tony: I'd say stop by the car, there's a slice of pizza left but we can't blow your cover, man.
McGee: I've been out here for hours and I've gotten nowhere. No one's seen him for days. They think he moved on.
Tony: Don't give up. Boy it's pretty toasty in this car.
- Permalink: Tony poking the McBear.