Anthony (Tony) DiNozzo Quotes
Vance: Any questions?
Tony: Just one. Why?
Admiral Kendall: I've been asking myself that for years. Amanda was valedictorian in high school. Straight A's in college. Georgetown. And then she suddenly flunked out. She spent the last two years wasting her life jet-setting across Europe with a group of international trust fund brats, partying in every capital in the continent.
Tony: Well maybe she just needed to find herself, sir.
Admiral Kendall: Well now it's gone too far.
- Permalink: Now, go fetch my wayward daughter.
McGee: What do you get if you kick a dog? Trip to Hawaii?
Tony: Death by Abby.
- Permalink: Death by Abby.
Tony: Oui, oui, monsieur. Je suis very special Agent DiNozzo.
Ducky: The French do see arrogance as a virtue. So you'll be welcome there. But remember: in France, only tip 6%.
- Permalink: Ducky's tips for France.
Tony: Are you flirting with me at a crime scene, Inspector?
Inspector Cheblis: No. Maybe, I don't know. Does it matter?
Tony: Your timing could be better.
Inspector: Maybe you're only uncomfortable because you're not used to being a witness.
- Permalink: French flirtation.
Tony: And you're welcome, by the way.
Amanda: For what?
Tony: For saving your bony ass, Princess Leia.
- Permalink: Under-appreciated DiNozzo.
Tony: You know what I think? I think you're not some brain-dead little party girl. I think that all of this is an act. And I think you are some kind of spy, working for Amir and the Iranian government. Am I crazy?
Amanda: Half crazy, Tony. I am a spy. But Amir works for me, and I work for the same people you do.
- Permalink: Tony's not completely crazy.
McGee: I'm not spending the night out here, Tony. I'm cold and I'm starving.
Tony: I'd say stop by the car, there's a slice of pizza left but we can't blow your cover, man.
McGee: I've been out here for hours and I've gotten nowhere. No one's seen him for days. They think he moved on.
Tony: Don't give up. Boy it's pretty toasty in this car.
- Permalink: Tony poking the McBear.
Tony: How long?
McGee: Just this once? Okay it's been the whole time. We've been working late. I was weak.
Tony: I don't even know who you are anymore.
McGee: Wait, please, I have another one. Here. Take it. It's yours.
Tony: You can't buy me with your pepperoni. I want steak. Creamed spinach. French fries.
Bishop: Can I get in on this?
McGee: Yes. Absolutely. Steaks all around, my treat. Let's go.
- Permalink: McGee gets busted.
Samson: I only ran to keep up with appearances. The fake punches were a great touch though.
Tony: Those were real punches.
Samson: That's funny. I like you.
- Permalink: Just kidding. They were totally fake. Right, Tim?
Delilah: With this case, he thinks I'm trying to lose my job but I'm not. It's the opposite. I'm trying to show that I can do more, to move up.
Tony: I can understand that.
Delilah: Because there's this senior analyst opening in Dubai.
Tony: Dubai is not here.
Delilah: I know. Which leads me to another thing that I need to tell Tim.
- Permalink: Tony the sounding board.
Jones: If I'd know you were coming I would have stayed and baked cookies.
Tony: Hey. I have to ask.
Jones: Brisco kept me so high I barely remember crawling out of that place on my hands and knees. I found a gun that he left behind and I hid in a storm drain across the street until the drugs got out of my system. Agent DiNozzo, if I was in on this, why would I risk coming back for Melody?
- Permalink: But what kind of cookies?
McGee: It's a voodoo doll that looks just like you, right down to the insincere grin. What's the note say?
Tony: Little Tony will bring you good luck and happiness. That's not funny. There's nothing funny about voodoo, ever since I saw "Live and Let Die" when I was a kid.
McGee: It's a doll. It's a stuffed toy.
Tony: So was Chucky.
- Permalink: Bishop picks the *best* gifts, doesn't she?
McGee: Rule number 70 - keep digging till you hit bottom.
Abby: McGee! There is no rule 70.
McGee: Well, I--
Abby: You just made up a rule. This McGibbs thing has really gone to your head. I don't even recognize you right now.
[voiceover] Anyone can achieve their fullest potential, who we are might be predetermined, but the path we follow is always of our own choosing. We should never allow our fears or the expectations of others to set the frontiers of our destiny. Your destiny can't be changed but, it can be challenged. Every man is born as many men and dies as a single one.McGee
- Permalink: Anyone can achieve their fullest potential, who we are might be ...