Leslie: You wanted to run something by me?
April: Yes. So well you help me?
Leslie: you don't need me! You can get whatever job you want!

Andy: Ohh babe you had a crush on me, that's emabrassing!
April: We're married.
Andy: Still!

Oh yeah, you completely disgraced yourself and almost destroyed an entire town!

Andy: I get to push the buttons! I call it!
April: He called it.
Leslie: Yeah I know.

April: But in the end? Bringing a child into this world? That's disgusting!
Andy: Nooo, we'd wipe all the disgusting stuff right off it!

Ann: Once again, they are my biological children.
April: And once again, I don't believe you.

Parks & Rec Quotes

Leslie: I know you're not gay.
Tom: No, I'm not.
Leslie: But you're effeminate.
Tom: What?
Leslie: Well, you're wearing a peach shirt with a coiled snake on it.
Tom: That's because it was featured in Details magazine, and it's awesome.

Look, Tammy and I don't work. We are oil and water. Or oil and TNT and C4 and a detonator and a butane torch.

Ron