Entourage

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Ari Gold Quotes (Page 34)

Season 3, Episode 2: "One Day in the Valley"

Lloyd: My widget says it's 96 already.
Ari: What the f**k's a widget? Why are you sitting like that? Seriously, what, are you sitting on a butt plug?
• Rating: Unrated

Ari: This is Hollywood, Lloyd. The only thing Mongolian is barbeque
• Rating: Unrated

Ari: After the year that I've had and on the most important day of my life, you'd think she would ask me what I wanted. You know? A nice blowjob perhaps, where I could just sit back for the first time in nine months and can do nothing but admire the top of her head and pray that this f**king movie opens so I can stop selling off assets like we're f**king Michael Jackson!
• Rating: Unrated

Ari: It wasn't the Cubs' fault when that douche bag grabbed that foul ball either, but they still don't get a World Series Ring. There are no asterisks in this life, only scoreboards, and ours is currently reading "F**ked"
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Marriage Counselor: When was the last time you had sex?
Ari: With each other, or...?
• Rating: Unrated

Ari: Well that was refreshing, but now I have to go home and hammer the wife.
Vince: Hey, give us a lift?
Ari: Anything to keep me away from my house, come on baby
• Rating: Unrated

Ari: The first west coast numbers are in, and they're big.
Eric: Go on.
Ari: Eight leg big, bitch.
Eric: Get the f**k out of here!
Ari: The webcrawler is in our sights, and I want to squash that f**ker!
• Rating: Unrated

Season 3, Episode 1: "Aquamom"

Ari [to Lloyd]: I want every desk to be sterile enough for you to get trained on!
• Rating: Unrated

Ari [holding up finger]: What the f**k is this?
Lloyd: Your finger.
Ari: It's dust Lloyd, it's f**king dust! Why is it here?!
Lloyd: The cleaning staff's on strike. You know that.
Ari: They strike, you work. Your Asian, you're supposed to be a neat freak
• Rating: Unrated