Season 2, Episode 9: "The Bat Mizvah"
[after his neighbor's dog craps in his yard]Ari: Don't even think about not picking that up, Ray, 'cause I'll f**king kill you!
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Mrs. Gold: Ari, you're a partner now. You don't have to be afraid of him anymore.
Ari: I'm afraid of him? I'll beat that old f**k and throw him in the pool.
Ari [to the kids]: Only Daddy speaks that way.
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Ari: Look at Terrance. I guarantee you his relatives worked with Nazis
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Vince [to Ari's daughter]: Look at you. You look beautiful!
Ari's Daughter: Thanks, so do you!
Ari: You look great too, E. What'd you do, raid the boys department at Macy's?
Eric: You look pretty good too. You auditioning for "Guys and Dolls?"
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Mrs. Gold: You're being ridiculous!
Ari: I'm being... That's exactly what you said at the "Bill and Ted" premiere when Terrance said, "I'll take Keanu, you take the other guy."
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Season 2, Episode 7: "Oh, Mandy"
Ari: Don't worry about it, E. When they do a Top 40 Under 4 Feet, BOOM, top of the list!• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Ari: Ah, SCUBA. A sport normally reserved for the rich but you get lessons from a Navy Seal because you happen to have been born next to Vince
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Eric: What's behind door number two, Ari?
Ari: Door number two is a list?
Eric: What list?
Ari: James Cameron's list for Aquagirl, five of the hottest actresses on the planet, one of which, you will be stuck in a water tank with for nine months. Even if you look like our skim milk-colored friend E here, you still have a good shot of swimming in-betwen her legs
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Ari [answering the phone]: You got Gold.
Dana: Do you really answer the phone that way or did you see it was me?
Ari: Dana Gordon, the second love of my life, what can I do for you?
Dana: Look, I have a little-heads up, okay, but it's for your ears only. Swear you won't tell anyone.
Ari: Did I tell anyone that your first girl-girl sex was with someone from must-see TV in '95?
Dana: Okay, Ari, please.
Ari: Spill it. I'll swallow a cyanide tablet if they capture me
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Season 2, Episode 6: "The Sundance Kids"
Ari: You don't come to Sundance for the snow. You come for the heat!• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Total Quotes: 388
