As your friend, I support your strange aversion to fun. But as a directed, I'm concerned.

When a man finds his calling, all is right in the world.

He's never late. He runs like an expensive Swiss watch reproduced cheaply in China.

I really want to give you a standing ovation.

I developed my whole persona around conflict avoidance.

You're the hottest girl in school and I wear saddle shoes on legs that don't work.

Artie: Am I about to lose my virginity?
Brittany: Before our deut, we're gonna do it.

Brittany was the only person we could find on short notice. We bribed her with Dots.

Sam: Everything Bieber does is epic.
Artie: Truth.

Will: Rachel have you ever seen a tackle football game? When they tackle, it hurts.
Artie: And not in a good, Mellencamp kind of way.

Artie: I told my parents I only want one thing for Christmas this year: stop friending me on Facebook.

Is the problem your outfit? You look like a cheerleader zombie corpse.

Glee Quotes

Kiss my ass, Josh Groban! I'm an internationally-ranked cheerleading coach!

Sue

I'm gonna miss all of you. I love you guys.

Puck