Barney Stinson Quotes
I want to be confused with you.
Barney: Never ever meet a girl's parents.
Ted: Not even if she is hot?
Barney: Not even if her mom's hot?
Barney: The N'Sync concert?
Ted: 1998 Cleveland's Agora Theater, front row, caught JC's shirt, what else you got
Nora: I'm sorry I've been trying not to stare at your chest all night.
Barney: Hahaha, what's that like?
Cardiologist: What happened at 8:46 PM last night.?
Barney: Well let's see, Wheel of Fortune, naked push ups, naked chin ups... oh I was at dinner.
Never screw over a girl whose last name ends in a vowel, because she's got brothers.
Lily: Ooo Barney's got feelings for a girl.
Barney: Yeah, penis feelings!
And I thought Pompeii was smoking.
With great penis comes great responsibility.
I'm Barney Stinson, I don't get smitten, I smite!
We're exes, we're probably due for a back slide, or we could just do it the normal way.
Lily: You should work at a carnival.
Barney: I tried; they're pretty strict with backgrounds.