Barney Stinson Quotes (Page 36)
Season 4, Episode 1: "Do I Know You?"
Barney: It's like a disease. I slept with Robin one time and I caught feelings, I caught feelings bad. I used protection and everything
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Barney: Bimbos make me happy. Bimbos make me feel alive. Bimbos make me want to pretend to be a better man. This whole thing with Robin was just a fling, but at the end of the day, my heart belongs to bimbos
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 3, Episode 19: "Everything Must Go"
Barney: Why are you trying to ruin my life?
Abby: You slept with me and you never called me again.
Barney: And?
Abby: That's it!
Barney: That's it?! As far as I'm concerned if I leave you safe on a dry land with adequate transportation home you got nothing to complain about!
• Rating: 2.0 / 5.0
Barney: Abby and I are in love. Not hot, passionate love. Couple love! You know, movie night with my girlfriend then waiting for her to go to bed so I can steal one pitiful moment of hollow ecstasy by the cold blue light of my computer monitor
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 3, Episode 18: "Rebound Bro"
Barney: No offense, Randy, but there is a long list of candidates for this slot. This slot is Vice President of Awesome. And you're like Assistant Undersecretary of Only OK.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 3, Episode 17: "The Goat"
Ted [about sleeping with Robin]: By the way, my mother is coming to visit next week. Maybe you would like to nail her too!?
Barney: Are you saying you don't want to be bros anymore?
Ted: I'm saying I don't want to be friends anymore
• Rating: Unrated
Ted: Hey Barney, I'm get rid of some of my old stuff; do you want my X-Box?
Barney: [gasps in horror] She has a name, Ted! Just what are you accusing me of?
Ted: Uh, liking video games
• Rating: Unrated
Robin: Now we go back to exactly the way things were before.
Barney: Okay.
Robin [whispering]: Okay.
Barney: All right... So Robin?
Robin: Yes Barney?
Barney: Guess who nailed the chick from Metro News One last night?
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Robin: Okay, here's the deal Barney; the moment my feet touch the ground this never happened.
Barney: Okay. Wait! [lifts up covers] Right-Click, Save As, Into the b-peg folder and Okay! This never happened. It's a good plan
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Barney: So... I just slept with my best friend's ex-girlfriend.
Robin: And I just slept with ex-boyfriend's really good friend.
Barney: Best friend.
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
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Total Quotes: 578
