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How I Met Your Mother (Page 6)

Barney Stinson
Quotes

Ted: Can't you just leave the place open a little while longer? We'll keep an eye on things.
Carl: You two? No way, you wouldn't know the first thing about running a bar.
Barney: Serve the hotties first?
Carl: Here's the keys
 • Show: How I Met Your Mother • Rating: UnratedPermalink
Ted: We should buy a bar.
Barney: Of course, we should buy a bar!
Ted: We should totally buy a bar.
Barney: We should totally buy a bar. Our bar would be awesome. And dude, dude, dude, dude... the name of our bar... Puzzles. People will be, like, "Why is it called Puzzles?". That's the puzzle
 • Show: How I Met Your Mother • Rating: 9.8 / 10Permalink
Ted: So, how many people are in on this Party School Bingo thing?
Barney: Oh, it's just me.
Ted: So what's the point, then?
Barney: The point is to get five in a row.
Ted: And what do you get when you get five in a row?
Barney: I get Bingo
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Brunette: I don't know if you guys have ever seen Star Wars, but it's like Hoth out there.
Ted: Dibs.
Blonde: It reminds me of when I used to go sledding with my dad—before he left.
Barney: And dibs
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Barney [spins around on chair]: Why, hello, I've been waiting for you.
Ted: Wait a second, that's not our chair. Did you bring that chair yourself?
Barney: I needed one that swivels
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Marshall: You know what, Doug, I will gladly pay. And you know why? Cause that's what grown-ups do! They pay for their drinks and they don't get into fights. You know what I was doing while you guys were out there being immature? I tell you what I was doing...
Barney: ...your nails?!
Marshall: Haha, No, I was doing...
Ted: ...a relationship-quiz in this month's Cosmo?!
Marshall: No, I was doing...
Barney: Your best not to cry when Big came back for Carrie at the end of the Sex and the City movie?!
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Barney [referring to the naked man's success]: All these years I've been suiting-up when I should've been suiting-down
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Barney: I know. We are Swedish. We are so cool with our baguettes and our Eiffel Tower.
Marshall: Dude, Sweden is not France, you know that, right?
Barney: Oh, it's France!
 • Show: How I Met Your Mother • Rating: 9.0 / 10Permalink
Barney: God, it's me, Barney. What up? I know we don't talk much, but I know a lot of girls call out your name because of me. Awesome
 • Show: How I Met Your Mother • Rating: 9.7 / 10Permalink
Marshall [looking inside Barney's "Not a Fathers Day" card]: It appears to be some sort of Asian hooker.
Barney: Yes, because on Not a Fathers Day, you get a Thai you'd actually wear! Wordplay five!
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Total Quotes: 315

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