From now on I'll dominate you in ways you don't realize.

I dump on you, and you take it. That's how friendship works.

I've been acting like a 10 year old the last 30 years, but I swear i'm going to grow up and act 20 like a divorced 40 year old should.

Who cares what we look like in whatever stupid year this is.

People also lover a quitter. Sarah Palin. The Beatles.

Jimbo: Your fists are sisters?
Dolph: Yeah, Pocahontas and Sacagawea!
Bart: Nice save.

I'll get one those jobs where you don't need to read. Like french fry maker or general.

Developer: I have twins I've never met.
Bart: When you meet them tell them your game is too easy.

Bart: To sweeten the deal, I'll pick you first for basketball.
Martin: To be a mathlete without the 'm.'

Milhouse: I need that [cootie] shot, my dog and I accidentally touched tongues.
Bart: How is this accidentally when it's the fifth time?

Traitor. How dare you betray me on me on the planet that got me laid?

Marge: I take your sugary sweets and give you healthy items...
Bart: This is exactly why kids need a union.

The Simpsons Quotes

Homer: (Wearing glasses) The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side!
Man: (From inside a bathroom stall.) That's a right triangle, you idiot!
Homer: D'oh!

Mayor Quimby: And, uh, may the Force be with you.
Leonard Nimoy: You have no idea who I am, do you?
Mayor Quimby: Sure, I do. You're one of the Little Rascals, right?