The Simpsons

Bart Simpson Quotes (Page 6)

Bart: Quit going for my groin.
Israeli Girl: No groin, no Krav Maga. Hello groin.
 • Rating: 4.9 / 5.0

Bart: You don't fight like a girl, or even a Milhouse.
Israeli Girl: I don't know what is Milhouse.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Bart: Why am I running from a girl? Hey call me when you're old enough for a Bat Mitzvah and I'll send you an envelope full of nothing.
 • Rating: Unrated

Hoomer [seeing Bart taking out paper from the Wailing Wall]: Hey boy, we're supposed to be acting religiously, what are you doing?
Bart: Reading prayers and ignoring them, just like God.
 • Rating: Unrated

Bart [about Skinner]: Hey, Willie, does he taste like failure?!
 • Rating: Unrated

Nikki: I know CPR!
Bart: Nikki, no! I prefer a dead child to a law suit from your parents.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Homer: We'll be sued into the poor house and we'll be forced to eat garbage the rest of our lives.
Bart: That's no problem, mom can make garbage taste great.
Marge: Thank you.
Bart: I mean it.
Marge: And it means the world to me.
 • Rating: Unrated

Bart: I need to talk about man stuff.
Homer: Talk to grampa, he used to be a man.
Bart: He did?
 • Rating: Unrated

Bart: Where's Mrs. K?
Principal Skinner: Mrs. Krabappel had to go to Portland. Apparently the people she hired to deprogram her sister from that cult were an even worse cult.
 • Rating: Unrated

Bart: Weird, I just made an entire lose its lunch.
Nelson: And?
Bart: I'm not feeling the rush.
Nelson: Tell me more.
Bart: Something's missing. Am I broken?
Nelson: Jump with me. Bart, at the end of the day, if your parents aren't p.o.'d you haven't really pranked. You have to take it up a notch.
Bart: Really?
Nelson: If no one's getting mad, are you really being bad? Think about it.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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