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Parks-and-recreation

Ben: Today is Leslie’s last day as a counselor, so everyone needs to be extra supportive.
Ron: Already done. When I walked past her this morning, I gave her a kind nod.

Remember when last year no one got flu shots because there was a rumor they’d turn you European?

Once she starts thinking about birthday cake, she becomes useless until she has birthday cake.

Ben: I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to have a weapon at work.
Ron: Literally, everything is a weapon. That folder in my hands is far deadlier than this bow in yours.

Ingrid: We purchased HBO for the entire town.
Ben: You spent government money on a TV subscription?
Ingrid: It's not TV.

Well, Jerry was never the type to rise above mediocrity. Or to it.

Tom: Pop quiz. Name the scent.
Ben: Umm Spasm. No, Butterface!

Ben: I can't believe they're finally giving me the key to the city.
Leslie: I can't believe it took so long. They gave the key to every other mayor in the city. And none of them had as cute a butt as you.

Ben: Tom, we got you an autographed picture of your personal hero.
Tom: No way! Scott Caan from Hawaii 5-0!

Leslie: I love you and I like you.
Ben: I love you and I like you.

Leslie: But my mom isn't here. And you parents aren't here.
Ben: Good!

Wanna stick around? I've got a bunch of Homeland episodes burning a hole in my DVR.

Displaying quotes 13 - 24 of 85 in total

Parks & Rec Quotes

Time is money, money is power, power is pizza, and pizza is knowledge, let’s go!

April

Andy: From now on, we will be using code names. You can address me as
Eagle One. Ann, code name -- Been There, Don That. April is --
Currently Doing That. Donna is -- It Happened Once in a Dream; Chris,
code name -- If I Had To Pick a Dude. Ben is -- Eagle Two.
Ben: Oh thank God.

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