Bree: Now what were you going to say?
Andrew: Well, um...Danielle is upstairs trying to commit suicide.
(Bree questions Andrew with a look, then rushes upstairs with Orson)
Andrew: No rush...she isn't trying that hard!

Bree: Is my daughter alright?
Doctor: She'll be fine. The wounds are very superficial.
Andrew: (smirks) So is the patient.

Bree: I'm not telling who it is. I'm just asking the question. If you know a husband has been unfaithful, do you tell the wife?
Lynette: Absolutely! If he's been cheating, he could bring home a disease.
Bree: Okay, that's what I was thinking. I mean, that's how Bunny Connors got chlamydia.
Gabrielle: She told me she got it from wearing someone else's bathing suit.
Lynette: No, that's how she got crabs.
Gabrielle: With Bunny, it's always something. If it's not the clap, it's a botched face lift.

Orson: When Andrew was on the street, he...uh...he didn't just beg for money. At times he...well, he did things to earn it.
Bree: Well, good. I mean, I'd hate to think he had no work ethic at all.
Orson: What I mean is, men hired him...uh...to do things...things he wasn't very proud of.
Bree: Yardwork?
Orson: 'Fraid not.
Bree: Orson, you're scaring me. Did he do something awful?
Orson: No, no. Not awful. People do it all the time. I do it with you. I just don't pay you for it. (Bree's jaw drops and she gasps) I think someone could use some cocoa.

Bree: I am so tired of feeling like the worst mother who ever lived.
Andrew: You're not. There's grandma.
Bree: I just... I've tried so hard to set a good example. I've done the best I could to teach you kids right from wrong. Why isn't it taking?
Andrew: It took. I mean, we know the difference between right and wrong. We just chose wrong.
Bree: Why?
Andrew: Sometimes, when you push a kid really hard to go one way, the other way starts to look more entertaining.
Bree: (smiling) You're awful.
Andrew: I know. I blame shuddy parenting.

Bree: Some reporter. All she could tell me was what neighborhood they found him in. They don't have any contact information, no phone number, no address.
Orson: If he had an address, he would not be homeless.

(Bree and Orson are leaving to go find Andrew. Orson has only just found out Bree left him on the side of the road)
Danielle: You know, Andrew is not the only one having a rough year. I'm the one whose boyfriend got shot right in front of her.
(Orson looks at Bree stunned)
Bree: (to Orson) We'll... talk in the car.

(On the airport after Bree saw a report on TV about homeless teenagers)
Orson: Bree, what's the matter?
Bree: A reporter just did a story on homeless teens, and my son was one of them.
Orson: Oh, my God. Well, we'll call child welfare the minute we get to the resort.
Bree: Orson, you can't imagine that we're still going!
Orson: Darling, the tickets are nonrefundable.
Bree: My son is eating out of dumpsters!
Orson: Yes, but think how much better you'll be able to deal with this crisis after a nice, relaxing...
Bree: Orson! My child is in trouble. Don't make me choose between the two of you, because believe me, you will lose.

(In the bride's room, after Susan, Lynette and Gabrielle shared their concerns - regarding Orson - with Bree)
Bree: He did not hack her up and dissolve the pieces in acid!
Gabrielle: I said it was a theory.
Lynette: The point is, Alma disappeared under very suspicious circumstances.
Bree: I don't have time for this. I'm getting married now.
Susan: This is your day. You can push the ceremony back an hour. Now get that detective on the phone, talk things out with Orson.
Bree: I can't talk to Orson. It's bad luck for the groom to see
the bride before the wedding.
Lynette: You know what's really bad luck? Marrying a wife-killer.

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