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That was the first 20 seconds of a 40 minute conversation. Very informative.

You look about ready to marry Courtney Love.

Britta [to hungover Jeff]

Okay, if you're going to get all Upper East Side about this I think we're done.

Troy: The last thing I said to him was 'Suck it.
Britta: Me too.

Britta: Then you move to Vermont...
Troy: I'm sick of you saying that fighting is gay.
Abed: You know she has a point, in boxing you fight with a purse and a belt.

Bully: You want to dance?
Britta: Maybe to some show tunes.
Jeff: No, I want to beat the crap out of you and I'm going to enjoy it because you're just like this school: you're obnoxious, you're cramping my style and you smell like french fry oil.

Pierce: Agnostic, the lazy man's athiest. I'm a born again.
Sherry: Oh...
Pierce: We had a re-birthing ritual in my friend's hot tub. I'm now a level five laser lotus in my Buddhist community.
Britta: That does not sound like Buddhism, are you sure you're not in a cult?
Pierce: Just by asking that question, you put me down to a level four. You now owe me 2000 energon cubes.
Troy: Do you know how foolish you sound right now? What else do you believe in, blood transfusions?

Britta: The real reason men fight is to release their pent-up gayness.
Pierce: That guy wasn't gay, he had a mustache.

Jeff: Every piece of that condo is a piece of my life
Britta: Is that a bidet?
Jeff: That part is for resale value and Saturday afternoons

Maybe you're one of those rare people with nothing underneath the surface. Maybe, if you put stain remover on a turd, you don't get a diamond. You just get a turd, with less direction in life

Downgrading your lifestyle is your chance to grow as a person, maybe even become one.

Britta [to Jeff]

Britta: Are you okay? It looks like you have actual bedhead this morning.
Jeff: In fashion, I'm what's known as a taste-maker.
Britta: And you missed an entire side of your face shaving.
Jeff: And next month, so will Gwen Stefani

Displaying quotes 85 - 96 of 113 in total

Community Quotes

Annie: The midterm dance will need a visual theme. Like, 'Let's blow off steam,' and it's trains!
Chang: I have an idea!
Annie: Chang, your last idea was to murder.

If farts are fair game, so is God.

Duncan
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