He's the dumbest person on the planet, and that's coming from me.

Tina: Last week we were too sexy, this week we're too religious -- we can't win.
Brittany: Now I know how Miley feels like.

I made him a card that said 'heart attacks are just from loving too much.'

Is God an evil dwarf?

I did a book report on heart attacks if you wanna give it to the doctor. It got knocked down a whole grade because I did it in crayon.

Whenever I pray, I fall asleep.

Carl: I'm gonna put you under a little general anesthesia. You won't feel a thing.
Brittany: Like roofies?
Carl: Yea, totally.

I would just like to say that from now on I demand to have every solo in glee club. When I had my teeth cleaned I had the most amazing Britney Spears fantasy. I sang and dance better than her. Now I realize what a powerful woman that I am.

I'm more talented than all of you. I see that clearly now.

Please don't pull out all my teeth. I'll look like an adult baby, but with boobs.

This room looks like that room on that spaceship when I got probed.

I don't brush my teeth. I rinse my mouth out with soda after I eat. I was pretty sure Dr. Pepper was a dentist.

Glee Quotes

[to Finn] You know, I don't really know what's going to happen between us, but I know that you used to be the guy that would make me feel like the most special girl in the whole world, and it doesn't feel that way anymore. Now it just feels sad and confusing. And the worst part is that it doesn't even feel that bad anymore.


I'm engorged with venom, and triumph.