I had a cold and I took all my antibiotics at the same time and I forgot how to leave.

I'm pretty sure my cat is reading my diary.

The way to get a man to follow you forever, take his virginity. Madonna wrote a song about it.

When I pulled my hamstring, I went to a misogynist.

Sue: Anything else?
Brittany: Sometimes I forget my middle name.

Did you know that dolphins are just gay sharks?

Brittany: You're a really good dancer.
Finn: Thanks, but my feet weren't really dancing.
Brittany: That was the best part.

Glee Quotes

Seriously. I look like a gay Thundercat.

Jake

I'm gonna miss all of you. I love you guys.

Puck