Brittany: Can I ask you a question?
Sam: Oh, The Walking Dead isn't based on a true story. I already checked.
Brittany: That's not what I was going to ask, but, oh.
- Permalink: Can I ask you a question? Oh, The Walking Dead isn't based on ...
Brittany: I can't.
Sam: Is it my lips?
Brittany: No. Your lips are so soft and horizontal. I just like you too much to put you in danger.
Sam: Santana broke up with you.
Brittany: No, it's not just Santana. It's like, all the lesbians of the nation, and I don't know how they found out about Santana and I dating, but once they did, they started sending me, like, tweets and Facebook messages on Lord Tubbington's wall. I think it means a lot to them to see two super hot, popular girls in love, and I worry if they find out about you and I dating that they'll turn on you and get really violent and hurt your beautiful face and mouth.
- Permalink: I can't. Is it my lips? No. Your lips are so soft and horizo...
Sam: I'm totally into you. You're, uh, the only person that really understands me.
Brittany: It's cause you're a genius. And most people don't understand geniuses. Like most people didn't appreciate Einstein or the Spice Girls until it was too late.
- Permalink: I'm totally into you. You're, uh, the only person that really un...
Brittany: Did you lay out the line of cereal for me?
Sam: Well, it's Tuesday, and I know how you forget to eat breakfast on Tuesday because the first few days of the week tend to confuse you.
- Permalink: Did you lay out the line of cereal for me? Well, it's Tuesday,...
Brittany: Along with being beautiful, the three of us are National Show Choir Championship goddesses.
Santana: We are winners which is why Finn has asked us to come and shower you with the inspiration that is the unholy trinity.
- Permalink: Along with being beautiful, the three of us are National Show Ch...
I knew it. Mercedes was cloned.
- Permalink: I knew it. Mercedes was cloned.
I don't smell raspberry hair gel. Does anyone know where Blaine Warbler is?
- Permalink: I don't smell raspberry hair gel. Does anyone know where Blaine ...
[to Santana] I'm glad you came back to play Rizzo. I feel bad for Mercedes but if her parents want her to be a boy, then I don't know, I guess it makes sense.
- Permalink: I'm glad you came back to play Rizzo. I feel bad for Mercedes bu...
Santana: Let's just do the mature thing here. This is not an official break up. But let's just be honest that long distance relationships are almost impossible to maintain because both people are rarely getting what they need, especially at our age.
Brittany: This sounds a lot like a break up to me.
- Permalink: Let's just do the mature thing here. This is not an official bre...
Wow. Sad songs make me really sad and I don't want to be sad.
- Permalink: Wow. Sad songs make me really sad and I don't want to be sad.
Brittany: Being left behind sucks.
Santana: It's just a stupid prank.
Brittany: You don't get it. You left me behind and it hurt.
- Permalink: Being left behind sucks. It's just a stupid prank. You don't...
Brittany: Ah, young love.
Blaine: Do you remember when you started dating Santana and I started dating Kurt back before everyone was so busy and far away and things were so much simpler? We had so much more hope and innocence. Every day was just like Valentine's Day.
Brittany: We're still young. Shouldn't we still be experiencing those things?
- Permalink: Ah, young love. Do you remember when you started dating Santan...
[to Kurt] You know, these Mounds bars are delicious, but you have to eat them. If you just hold them in your hand hoping that you might get to eat them one day, they're going to melt and you'll look like somebody just pooped in your hand. Don't let waiting for things to maybe work out with Blaine turn you into the guy who looks like somebody just pooped in their hand.Brittany
Blaine: Where's the bed?
Brittany: I removed it because when I imagined you two having sex I imagined a U-haul mounting a moped.