Butters Stotch Quotes
I'm like the mailman!
- Permalink: I'm like the mailman!
What about the victims of 9/11? Their feelings matter for at least another ten months.Mr. Stotch
- Permalink: What about the victims of 9/11? Their feelings matter for at le...
All those ladies have stinky vaginas?
- Permalink: All those ladies have stinky vaginas?
Hello, excuse me! I know that you NASCAR people don't have very much. So I went out and bought you all $58 worth of canned food and blankets! You're welcome! (runs off) I helped the needy!
- Permalink: Hello, excuse me! I know that you NASCAR people don't have very ...
I have to get to South Park. If you give me a ride I can pay you the four dollars I made at the titty bar.
- Permalink: I have to get to South Park. If you give me a ride I can pay you...
(After being thrown out by the truck driver) He must like TGI Fridays.
- Permalink: He must like TGI Fridays.
Stan: Wow, your dad's a perv and your mom tried to kill you.
Butters: Yeah, you guys sure are gonna rip on me at school.
Cartman: We sure are.
Butters: Yeah, but as soon as we get to Bennigan's and I get my mozzarella burger I'll forget all about my dad being queer and my mom trying to kill me.
Butters: No, I'm lying.
- Permalink: Wow, your dad's a perv and your mom tried to kill you. Yeah, y...
Chorus: Everyone know it's Butters!
Butters: Well that's me!
- Permalink: Everyone know it's Butters! Well that's me!
Chris Stotch: You see, I've learned something today, and it took the knowledge of my young son here for me to realize it. Recently I'd been lying to my wife; I've been going to gay theaters and bath houses and having sex with anonymous men.
Linda: And when I found out about this I went crazy and I drove my son into the lake, I drove my son into the lake to kill him.
Chris: You see, we'd both been lying to all of you. And I know though many of you supported us, some of you also doubted us. You'd look at me and you'd say "Hello" but really you'd be thinking
(camera pan's to Gary Condit)
Liar! You're a liar! You know something you're not telling us you slimy scumbag liar! Or you be talking to my wife but secretly you'd be thinking
(camera pans to OJ)
MURDER! You got away with murder you stinking scumbag liar!
And that's what people would be thinking, or sometimes people would be talking with both of us and they would think
(camera pans to the Ramsey's)
MURDERER'S! You know goddamn well what happened to your kid so stop playing the victim and just confess you lying murdering liars!
(camera pans back to OJ)
(back to Gary Condit) LIAR!
(back to the Ramseys) CONFESS!
(camera pans over all of them) MURDERER, LIAR, CONFESS!
So the people we owe the biggest apology to is OJ, Jon and Pat Ramsey and Senator Gary Condit, because we gave them false hope of catching who ever hurt them this badly, and that's not right. We're sorry. And that's what people would be thinking. So who we really owe the biggest apology for is to OJ, Jon and Pat Ramsey and Senator Gary Condit, because we gave you false hope.
- Permalink: You see, I've learned something today, and it took the knowledge...