Sundays 8:00 PM on FOX
The-simpsons

Carl: It sure is nice not having Homer around to tell us where we can and can't park.
Lenny: Yeah. Without the crushing rule of law, society will do a better job of regulating itself.

Ned: Oh, I guess it's time for me to duck again.
Homer: No! I want everyone to know that-- (yelling out window) --this is Ned Flanders, my friend!
Lenny: What'd he say?
Carl: I dunno. Something about being gay.

Lenny: Hey, look! Homer's got one of those robot cars.
(Crash)
Carl: One of those American robot cars.

Homer: So uh...what do you guys think of Mindy?
Carl: We love cake. Anybody see the game last night?
Homer: Yeeeah. That Mindy seems real nice.
Lenny: Homer, what's with you? You're talking during a coffee break!
Carl: Yeah, usually you just take the box of donuts into the bathroom!
Homer: Mindy has a motorcycle!

Lenny: Aw, if they hire a woman we won't be able to spit on the floor.
Carl: And we can't take off our pants when it gets real hot.
Homer: And we won't be able to pee in the drinking fountain.
(Lenny and Carl stare at him)
Homer: Er, I mean, not--you know, if we wanted to--not that I ever did.

Lisa: This is madness. He's just peddling a bunch of easy answers.
Carl: And how!

Carl: Hey, Homer, you wanna get a beer on the way home?
Homer: (bitter) I can't. I gotta take my wife to the ballet.
Lenny: Heh, You're gonna go see the bear in the little car, huh?

Carl: Sir, your spare ribs, cooked just the way you like them.
Mr. Burns: Spare ribs eh? I've played around with ten pins a time or two in my life and, to me, the term spare reeks of second best. Give me ten full frames of strike ribs. [to Lenny]: And you, find my doctor and find out why I'd ask for something as insane as strike ribs.

Carl: All in favor of a strike?
Everyone: Aye!
Carl: And all opposed?
Man: Nay.
Homer: Who keeps saying that?
Man: It was him. Lets get him fellas.

Displaying quotes 19 - 27 of 41 in total