Charlotte "Chuck" Charles Quotes
Chuck: Don't offend the bees.
Ned: How would I offend the bees?
Ned: But do you hate me?
Chuck: I have to hate you a little, just for a little while. But I can’t do that if you stay
Ned: I don’t want you to hate me, I’ll stay.
Chuck: If you stay, I’ll just end up hating you more. Just go.
He's Lord of the Pies.
Olive: There's no alarm system. Got a credit card?
Chuck: Why? You know how to pick locks?
Olive: No. You're gonna need to pay for the damages.
Emerson: So whoever killed Billy is walking around with nine fingers thinking they got away with murder.
Chuck: Mm-hmmm. Footloose and finger-free.
Chuck: Guess what day it is today.
Ned: World Hello Day.
Chuck: Oh, you finally put up my calendar of obscure holidays.
Ned: Yes, and Hola!
I have no doubt you could make mince meat of us. If you wanted more mince meat.
Chuck: Oh! Then I’ll be polite and say, "Oh, I’m sorry I forgot my purse and I’ve got no pockets".
Emerson: Uh huh… well, hey somebody see, now I’m gonna need to see some ID on the count that you look just like that dead girl that got herself killed on that tropical cruise.
Ned: Okay, if that happens I'll say something like "What is this? A police state?" (pause) If I ever say that it means I'm having a panic attack.
Olive: (watching TV) Look there's the killer.
(Oscar walks into The Pie Hole)
Chuck: Look, there's the killer.
Olive: Oh, lord.
Ned: The only reason I didn't tell you is because it didn't mean anything. Lots of stuff happens in the course of a day that I don't bother sharing. For instance, yesterday's four-berry pie was actually three and a half because I ran out of cranberries. I didn't tell you that.
Chuck: Actually you did. You asked if orange counted as a berry and I said it didn't, but no one had to know but us.
Ned: I like that you said "us."
Ned: You're the only one for me.
Chuck: I know you feel that now, but there are things you want, there's things we both want.
Ned: So? Everyone wants stuff. We wake up everyday with a list of wishes a mile long and maybe we spend our lives trying to make those wishes come true, but just because we want them doesn't mean we need them to be happy.
Chuck: What do you need to be happy?
Ned: You.
(to Ned) I'm going to hug Digby and pretend that he's you.
