The Office

Creed Bratton Quotes (Page 4)

Creed: Did one of you tell Stanley that I have asthma. 'Cause I don't. If this gets out, they won't let me scuba. And if I can't scuba, what am I working toward?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Creed: Boss, this used to hang from my windshield but it belongs in here.
Michael: Hey, thank you, Creed. you're really getting this place.
Creed: No problem. I'll just have no idea who's driving behind me now.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Michael: Cafe Disco is dead but I can still hear the music in my head.
Creed: I hear it, too, Boss.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Creed: [playing chess] No. IF you do that, I'm gonna do that. IF you do that, I'm gonna do that. IF you do this, I'm gonna do that.
Jim: Well, what if I just do this?
Creed: You don't want to do that.
 • Rating: Unrated

Creed: It's crazy what's going on out there today, huh?
Jim: I know. Yeah, it's... kinda -
Creed: Sometimes it's best just to stay out of it.
Jim: That's true. That's right. Yeah.
 • Rating: Unrated

Creed: I want to set you up with my daughter.
Jim: Oh, I'm engaged to Pam.
Creed: I thought you were gay.
Jim: Then why would you want to set me up with your daughter?
Creed: I don't know.
 • Rating: 4.9 / 5.0

Creed: These are terrible boss. You gotta make them in a circle so that they cook evenly.
Michael: These are shaped like paper.
Creed: Well I don't even want these. [Takes rectangle pancakes out of his coat]
Meredith: I'll take them for my kid.
 • Rating: Unrated

Creed: [feeding coins into a vent] I think it's 75 cents.
Oscar: That's a lot.
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0

Pam: Thanks for much for helping the company, Dwight.
Dwight: Oh Pam.
Creed: Good work, kid.
Dwight: Thanks old man.
David: This, this is great. Oh, OK, look I want to get you on the horn with the marketing people in New York. The should meet you.
Dwight: Yeah.
David: Pam, could you set up a call in there in about 15 minutes, please?
Pam: Sure.
Michael: David? David?
 • Rating: Unrated

Michael: I am just a net that traps all of your crappy subconscious ideas and adds a little bit of my own childhood memories and whimsy, so -
Jim: So, well I lost a ton of money today and I have a mortgage, so I'm a little pissed too.
Michael: Thank you, Jim is with me.
Jim: Absolutely not, I'm mad at you.
Michael: Well you know what Jim? It is not my fault that you bought a house to impress Pam. That is why carnations exist.
Creed: That's not why.
 • Rating: Unrated

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