Damon: Go ahead. Let it all out, Bonnie. I’m a vile cheater. I couldn’t even wait a year.
Bonnie: Are you kidding me? The last thing anyone wants to deal with for the next six decades is a cranky, bitter, sexless Damon Salvatore, okay?

You made a wrong turn, brother. This isn’t some hell survivor support group.

Julian: You’ve driven away every soul who has ever cared for you.
Damon: I guess I’ll have to cuddle up next to the fire with all my rage.

What happened to your Hero Hair campaign to protect Mystic Falls?

I have no desire to kill Caroline. I mean, not since the last time I tried. I think we can all agree that was a huge misunderstanding.

Well, it’s not like I was expecting a parade, but where’s my parade?

Damon: You telling me my brother is still stuck in here and you brought me out first?
Bonnie: That didn’t sound like even a glimmer of a thank you…

This PTSD puppet show wouldn’t happen to be, by chance, a ploy to get me to feel remorse for your pointless death, would it? Because it ain’t working, Mama.

Mom, I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. Give me a chance to make it right. Give me a chance to let you love me. Okay?

Okay, this vervain stings like a bitch and this family drama makes the prospect of Hell look like Disneyland. So, please, one swift stab straight through the heart. Let's get this over with.

I'm only here because Stefan's a mama's boy and I don't want the silent treatment for the next century.

Bastard links his life to my mom's and then engages in a duel. What is this, Hamlet community theatre?

Vampire Diaries Quotes

You want a love that consumes you. You want passion and adventure, and even a little danger... I want you to get everything you're looking for. But for right now, I want you to forget that this happened. Can't have people knowing I'm in town yet. Goodnight, Elena.

Damon

Damon: You know what they are? Children. Like lighting a candle's going to make everything OK, or even saying a prayer. Or pretending Elena's not going to end up just like the rest of us murdering vampires. Stupid, delusional, exasperating little children. And I know what you're going to say: 'It makes them feel better, Damon.' So what? For how long? A minute, a day? What difference does it make? Because in the end, when you lose somebody, every candle, every prayer is not going to make up for the fact that the only thing you have left is hole in your life where that somebody that you cared about used to be. And a rock with a birthday carved into it that I'm pretty sure is wrong. So thanks, friend. Thanks for leaving me here to babysit. Because I should be long gone by now. I didn't get the girl, remember? I'm just stuck here fighting my brother and taking care of the kids. You owe me big.
Alaric: I miss you too, buddy.