Dan Humphrey Quotes
Dan: Blair, I'm sorry. I was totally out of line. The truth is I think I've been using you to avoid facing some problems of my own. I promised to hold your hand but maybe I've been forcing it.
Blair: No. I turned to you, Dan. Because I knew you were the only one who would protect me from my own worst instincts.
Dorota pieced this together. Apparently she's broken quote a few things in your home you don't know about.
Dan: Blair, we need to talk. Mind if I take over from here?
Simon Doonan: Not at all.
Blair: Well I mind. Humphreys are not escort material.
Blair: I can't face the press if I've just heard unsettling news. I need to look like Grace Kelly, not Grace Cottington.
Dan: I have to manage some business of my own, but go do your interview. I'll meet you back at your apartment.
Blair: That is much more civilized. Unlike your hair, Humphrey. You look like a muppet.
Noah Shapiro: So Dan Humphrey wrote an actual novel. And I was convinced you'd remain an epic disappointment.
Dan: Well I never intended to publish it.
Chuck: I suffer through mediocre sex with an editor's assistant to find out who's publishing your book and this is how you thank me?
Dan: Chuck, you felt nothing after Field of Dreams. So I'm taking it to the next level. If that movie can't make you feel, maybe this little guy can.
Dorota: We have problem. Doctor's office call four times to say paternity test ready for pick-up. Miss Blair say she busy, but reading Grace Kelly biography all day is not busy, is denial.
Dan: When does Louis get back from his trip?
Dorota: Tonight! And Miss Blair had promised us that she find out who baby daddy is before he get home.
Dan: All right, I have a couple things to do this morning but when I am done I will march her to the doctor's office myself if I have to.
Blair: What if i lose everything?
Dan: You'll still have me.
Dan: Treatment involves trying to make the patient feel again.
Chuck: That's what I was doing before you showed up.
Dan: Well, how about instead of pain, you try to feel good things? I could tickle you.
Nate (to Dan): I was going to ask how your summer's going, but since you're with Chuck, I'm guessing the answer's probably, "Weird."
Dan: Oh, it gets weirder.
Dan: Blair, what's going on? I thought you were mad at me.
Blair: And I forgive you if you shut up and guard the door.
Dan: It's not like you to forgive me. Or run away from a feast.
Dan: So now I just have to make sure the book that chapter comes from never sees the light of day.
Rufus: There's a whole book?
