Of course there were other guys - I don’t like the way you asked that question. Switch with her!

I was a five star man before the internet and I’m a five star man now. I just gotta shed the dead weight. God damn it!

Uh, well, don't talk about the system.

Dennis: I could find you oddly sexy.
Date: Excuse me?
Dennis: That was supposed to be, uh, a compliment.

Kim, hon, I'm detecting a little vibe from you - so why don't you come sit here.

I feel like he's the one who rescued me.

Girl: You know, you're weird.
Dennis: You have no idea.

Dennis: How many sleeping pills did you give that kid?
Frank: I don't know? 7? 12?

During the turbulence, she giggled - leads me to believe she's a thrill seeker.

Dennis: How many beers can we order at once?
Flight Attendant: I'm not sure, no one's ever asked that.

Charlie: Ladies and gentlemen, distinguished collies. My client, Frank here, isn't really on trial today, ya know. Common sense is on trial. And while common sense would tell you that eating a bowl of cereal while operating a car it's reckless, it's moronic, one might even call it, 'donkey-brained'.
Dennis: Donkey-brained?
Charlie: It means to have the brains of a donkey or a donkey-type creature.
Dennis: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think I know what it means, guy.

Mac: I'm gonna smash this (vase of flowers) over their goddam heads!
Dennis: Yes, Mac! Yes! I'm gonna blast them with this fire extinguisher!
Charlie: Okay, I'll toss hot soup in their faces.
Frank: I'm gonna pinch their dicks with this lobster.