Propel me back into the mid-'90s when Dennis Reynolds was a golden god.

We don't know who you're talking about. I don't understand this tour.

Chinese tourist [referring to Frank]

The helmet is sweet as shit. It's very Thunder Gun.

Dude hangs dong.

Cop

Thunder Gun leaves no man behind!

I wanna see Charlie do his thing and he's good.

Let's get high in the back office.

Charlie: Why is your face so shiny?
Dennis: I had my face peeled off with chemicals. Wanna know why?
Charlie: Not really.

There are far too many leather shops in Arizona as it is.

I am not getting hogtied over your lack of grace.

No peeing with me in the room!

These are the theories of lunatics!

It's Always Sunny Quotes

Charlie: I'll totally pull a Good Will Hunting on those kids and that'll put them in their place.
Mac: How you gonna do that?
Charlie: Well, you've seen the movie right?
Mac: Yeah.
Charlie: So all I gotta do is, I'll ask them some big shot, like math or science, history-type college question aand that will totally stump them by knowing a lot more about the answer than they do.
Mac: In that movie, Matt Damon played a genius janitor, you're just a janitor.
Charlie: Right, you stumped me with that one.

Mac: He doesn't have any poison.
Charlie: I don't have any on me, but I do keep some in my fridge at home in the relish jar.
Frank: There's poison in that jar? I thought I was allergic to pickles. What's in the jar with the skull and crossbones?
Charlie: Well that's mayonnaise. It's a decoy.
Frank: And the mayo?
Charlie: That's shampoo.
Frank: You're telling I've been putting shampoo on my sandwiches?
Charlie: If you've been using the mayonnaise, then yeah, probably.