Propel me back into the mid-'90s when Dennis Reynolds was a golden god.

We don't know who you're talking about. I don't understand this tour.

Chinese tourist [referring to Frank]

The helmet is sweet as shit. It's very Thunder Gun.

Dude hangs dong.

Cop

Thunder Gun leaves no man behind!

I wanna see Charlie do his thing and he's good.

Let's get high in the back office.

Charlie: Why is your face so shiny?
Dennis: I had my face peeled off with chemicals. Wanna know why?
Charlie: Not really.

There are far too many leather shops in Arizona as it is.

I am not getting hogtied over your lack of grace.

No peeing with me in the room!

These are the theories of lunatics!

It's Always Sunny Quotes

Frank: I opened up to a therapist just once. I was a kid. I got into a fight. The doctor asked me question after question, got me so scrambled up. Next thing I know, I was shanghai'd upstate to a nitwit school. You know what a nitwit school is?
Therapist: I assume you mean a school for the mentally disabled.
Frank (spits pistachio shell): Yeah, not just for nuts in the head, but bodies, too. Back then science was real crude, they stuck us all together. My roommate was a frog-kid. You ever see a frog-kid?

No I don't eat dragon, cause, uh, it's not a meal for peasants, it's a meal for kings, and I'm sort of a common man. But they don't eat us, it's a common misconception. They actually eat gold and treasure -- that's why they're always sitting on a pile of it.

Charlie