Dwight Schrute Quotes (Page 59)
Season 2, Episode 8: "Performance Review"
Dwight: Oh, hey. Listen, Jim. Here's a little tip for your performance review.
Jim: Okay.
Dwight: Tell Michael that we should be stocking more of the double-tabbed manila file folders.
Jim: We don't have double-tabbed manila file folders.
Dwight: Oh yes we do.
Jim: No we don't.
Dwight: Yeah, it's a new product. So you should just suggest that to him, and then he'll be sure to give you a raise.
Jim: All right. Well, I'm not asking for a raise. I'm going to actually be asking for a pay decrease.
Dwight: Uh, that is so stupid. What if he gives it to you?
Jim: Then I win.
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
Dwight: D - Determined W - Worker I - Intense G - Good Worker H - Hard Worker T - Terrific
• Rating: Unrated
Dwight: This ab workout is specifically designed to strengthen your core. Sorry.
Jim: It's all right.
Dwight: Numerous health benefits: strengthens your back, better performance at sports, more enjoyable sex.
Jim: You're not having sex.
• Rating: Unrated
Dwight: [sitting on a giant rubber ball] You should get one of these.
Jim: No, thank you.
Dwight: Do you even know what this is? It is a fitness orb, and it has completely changed my life. Forget everything you thought you knew about ab workouts.
Jim: Done.
• Rating: Unrated
Season 2, Episode 7: "The Client"
Pam: Here's what we think happened. Michael's sidekick who, all through the movie is this complete idiot who's causing the downfall of the United States, was originally named Dwight. But then Michael changed it to Samuel L. Chang using a search and replace. But that doesn't work on misspelled words. Leaving behind one "Dwigt." And Dwight figured it out. Ooops.
Dwight: D-W-I-G-H-T.
• Rating: Unrated
Dwight: Announcement: My uncle bought me a bunch of fireworks, so whoever wants to see a real show come with me!
• Rating: Unrated
Dwight: Yes I have acted before. I was in a production of "Oklahoma!" in the 7th grade. I played the part of Mutey the Mailman. They had too many kids so they made up roles like that. I was good.
• Rating: Unrated
Michael: OK. Let's do this thing. Wish us luck.
Dwight: Good luck, Michael! Good luck, Jan!
Jan: Thank you.
Michael: Kiss ass.
• Rating: Unrated
Season 2, Episode 6: "The Fight"
Dwight: I come from a long line of fighters. My maternal grandfather was the toughest guy I ever knew. World War Two veteran. Killed twenty men then spent the rest of the war in an Allied prison camp. My father...battled blood pressure and obesity all his life. Different kind of fight.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Michael: Look, Dwight here is a wuss. When we rented "Armageddon", he cried at the end of it.
Dwight: Michael, I told you! It was because it was New Year's Eve and it started to snow at exactly midnight!
Michael: [As Dwight] "Oh, are they really gonna leave Bruce Willis on the asteroid? Boo-hoo!"
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
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Total Quotes: 622