Ed Quotes
Season 8, Episode 5: "My ABC's"
Intern: You gonna go to the hemoglobin lecture?
Ed: No can do other Indian guy, I'm about to go get some pizza!
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 8, Episode 2: "My Last Words"
Ted: Hey, Mr. Valentine. I re-did your will on a computer. And to make it less depressing, I used a fun font.
• Rating: Unrated
Ed: When you disrespect someone, and they in turn burn your ass, you must RECOGNIZE!
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 8, Episode 1: "My Jerks"
J.D.: Ed! Stop texting.
Ed: I'm not texting. I'm looking at photos of Sienna Miller's breasts. There's a difference.
J.D.: Okay, we'll do that more later when we're together.
• Rating: Unrated
J.D.: Somebody has some very soft hands.
Ed: I sleep in gloves.
• Rating: Unrated
Dr. Maddox: (Looking in Ted's briefcase) Hey, how come all you have in here is a smiley face button and a revolver?
Ted: Well...one's in case I get sad and...the other one's in case I get really sad.
Dr. Maddox: Well! See you tomorrow.
Ted: We'll see.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 5, Episode 18: "My New Suit"
Jordan: What's going on?
Ted: I love you too dumpling, but I have to work late. I'll make it up to you this weekend.
Dr. Cox: Ted's on the phone with his mom, so we're taking five.
• Rating: Unrated
Ted: What's a "Buckland"?
Dr. Cox: It is a predominately hairless growth that is never found on women.
Ted: Weird.
Dr. Cox: It's your last name Ted.
Ted: Good one!
• Rating: Unrated
Dr. Cox: Since Sweaty Teddy here backs up his infinitesimal knowledge of the law with absolutely zero knowledge of medicine, one of you is going to have to help him go through the claims deciphered for the medical stuff and somehow relay all of that into his tiny peanut brain. Ted, how many times did I insult you during that speech, I was shooting for five?
Ted: Only three unless you count "Sweaty Teddy" as an insult but my mom calls me that and she loves me, right?
Dr. Cox: No Ted, she hates you. Four. Since Ted has no life and that is five.
• Rating: Unrated
Season 5, Episode 8: "My Big Bird"
Ted: Hey Carla, did you hear the lottery's up to a hundred million? If I win that baby it's separate beds for me and my mum!
Carla: Yeah, and you could spend the other 99.999.000 on therapy!
• Rating: Unrated
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Total Quotes: 84
