Elaine: Jerry, you can barbecue back here (points to garden).
Jerry: They deliver the coal?
Elaine: Sure, it's probably the same guy, who delivers the wood.
Jerry: Oh, than I gotta tip him.

Excuse me, uh, I don't mean to cause any trouble here, but George, if you take it, can I take your place?

Policeman: Let's see, that's uh, one TV, a stereo, one leather jacket, a VCR and a computer is that 'bout it?
Elaine: Answering machine.
Jerry: Answering machine. Oh, I hate the idea of someone out there returning my calls.

Elaine: C'mon lets go, c'mon
Jerry: Was I supposed to bring something?
Elaine: You could have.
Jerry: I met her one time
Elaine: It is not necessary.

Elaine: Hi Pamela, you remember Jerry.
Pamela: Yes, we met.
Jerry: Hi, happy birthday.
Pamela: Ahh, everybody, this is Elaine and Jerry.
Guests: Hi!
Jerry: I didn't bring anything.

Jerry: What's that one?
Elaine: "Cocoon II: The Return". I guess they didn't like it up there
Jerry: Maybe they came back for Chinese food. Y'know Maureen Stapleton, if she gets a craving, she's probably screaming at those aliens, "I gotta have a Lo Mein!"

Elaine: What do you think their parents think?
Jerry: "So, uh, what's your son doing now, Dr. Stevens?" "Oh, he's a public fornicator. Yes, he's a fine boy."

A wedding!? Have you lost it, man?

Displaying quotes 205 - 212 of 212 in total

Seinfeld Quotes

Elaine: (referring to Dr. Reston) He's like a Svenjolly.
Jerry: Svengali.
Elaine: What did I say?
Jerry: Svenjolly.
Elaine: Svenjolly? I did not say Svenjolly.
Jerry: George?
George: Svenjolly. (licking some peanut butter off his finger)
Elaine: I don't see how I could've said Svenjolly.
Jerry: Well, maybe he's got, like, a cheerful mental hold on you.

(to George) I don't know what your parents did to you.

Elaine
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