Jules: Ellie is not a morning person. Or a night person. There's really only about seven minutes a day you are fun to be around.
Ellie: The best part is you never know when they're coming.

Jules: I'm not gonna stand here and be judged by someone who doesn't even have a nineteen year old, and most of all, who thinks there's a ghost in her pickup truck.
Ellie: Then...who keeps moving my sunglasses Jules? Who?

Ellie: I'm gonna say it. The clingy mom act? It's not cute anymore. In fact, it's ugly on you. Just like scarves.
Jules: I look bad in scarves?
Ellie: They give you bird face.

Jules: I put cough syrup in his lemonade and he fell asleep in a hole.
Ellie: You know, out of context, that sounds like a horrible abduction story.

Ellie: Imaginary hat!
Jules: Imaginary hook hands! I don't know what we're doing.

Jules: Name one thing I've done to Travis that is "meddlesome."
Bobby: Watched him sleep.
Ellie: You scared his girlfriend away.
Laurie: You want to live in his blood.

Jellybean! You just simultaneously uttered the dumbest and the smartest things you've ever said!

Kirstin: Trav stop! You're embarrassing me.
Ellie: He can't stop. He was cooked in her baby oven.

All Valentine's day means to me is that it's seven weeks after Christmas.

Jules if we had to elect a group leader it would be you. You bring us all together.

Jules: Ellie, friend test.
Ellie: Fine, I'll come.
Bobby: Friend test?
Jules: Yeah. It's when you call your entire friendship into question and force them into doing something. I came up with it.
Trav: Sounds like you.

Jules: I would like some of that fancy wine.
Ellie: Do it Wayne.
Jules: Oh no! I brought my own glass. It's big Carl. Fill em up.

Cougar Town Quotes

Tell her I'll get like, jury duty drunk.

Laurie

Don't hate the player, hate the game, yo!

Ellie